Tropic Thunder (2008)

Bill Hader: Studio Executive Rob Slolom - Vietnam Crew

Photos 

Quotes 

• Four Leaf Tayback : Spanking a child turns him into a snot. Fear, that's what makes him a man. I know a place where a man's worth is measured by the ears hanging off his dog tags. The real hardcore shit! You wanna make this movie right? That's where you take your pansy ass actors.

  Les Grossman : [beat]  Who is this guy?

  Studio Executive Rob Slolom : Les, that's Four Leaf.

  Four Leaf Tayback : Sergeant Four Leaf Tayback. I wrote the book.

  Les Grossman : Wow. You're a great American. This nation owes you a huge debt. Now shut the fuck up and let me do my job!

• Studio Executive Rob Slolom : Wow. 8 Oscars, 400 million dollars, and you saved Tugg Speedman's career.

  Les Grossman : I couldn't have done it without you.

  Studio Executive Rob Slolom : Really?

  Les Grossman : No, dickhead. Of course I could. A nutless monkey could do your job. Now, go get drunk and take credit at all the parties.

  Studio Executive Rob Slolom : I wouldn't do that.

  Les Grossman : Ah... joking.

  Studio Executive Rob Slolom : Ah, there he is! Funny. You're a funny guy.

  Les Grossman : Yeah. But seriously, a nutless monkey could do your job.

• Les Grossman : Speedman is a dying star. A white dwarf headed for a black hole. That's physics. It's inevitable.

  Studio Executive Rob Slolom : We've been handed an incredible opportunity here, Peck.

  Les Grossman : The universe... is talking to us right now. You just gotta listen.

  [turns on T-Pain's Apple Bottom Jeans and begins to dance to the beat] 

  Les Grossman : See, this is the good part, Pecker. This is when the job gets fun! Ask... and you shall receive!

  Studio Executive Rob Slolom : [dancing along]  Right...

  Les Grossman : You play ball... we play ball. I knoowwww... you want the goodies!

  Studio Executive Rob Slolom : Welcome to the goodie room!

  Les Grossman : You paying attention? I'm talking... G5, Pecker! That's how you can roll. No more frequent flyer bitch miles for my boy! Oh yeah! Playa... playa! Big dick playa!

  Studio Executive Rob Slolom : Swinging past ya knees!

  Les Grossman : Big dick, baby!

  Studio Executive Rob Slolom : Yep.

  Les Grossman : [turns off the music]  Or... you can grow a conscience in the next five minutes and see where that takes you.

  Rick Peck : Let me get this straight. You want me to let my client of 15 years, one of my best friends, die in the jungle alone, for some money and a G5?

  Les Grossman : Yes.

  Rick Peck : [pause]  A G5 airplane?

  Les Grossman : [whispering]  Yes... and lots of money... playaaaa!

  [turns on the music and dances again] 

• Rick Peck : [about Speedman]  They're going to kill him!

  Les Grossman : And we'll weep for him... in the press, set up a scholarship in his name, eventually - and I'm talkin' way, way down the road - we file an insurance claim.

  Studio Executive Rob Slolom : Preferably before the end of the fiscal year. Actually, the claim alone would net us more than the movie would lose.

• Studio Executive Rob Slolom : It's Les Grossman. He throws these words around. "Crisis", "explosion", "not rolling", "fired". These are just words.

• Les Grossman : What you gotta do is pull down their pants and spank their ass, you spank it.

  Studio Executive Rob Slolom : You spank that ass Les!