Two and a Half Men (TV Series)

Repeated Blows to His Unformed Head (2006)

Jon Cryer: Alan Harper

Quotes 

• Naomi : [the doorbell rings. Alan opens the front door and sees a pregnant woman standing there]  Hi. Yeah, I think I have the wrong address.

  Alan Harper : Oh, you have the right address.

  [loudly] 

  Alan Harper : Charlie, it's for you!

  Charlie Harper : Who is it?

  Alan Harper : Karma.

  Charlie Harper : What?

  Alan Harper : Your chickens have come home to roost.

  Charlie Harper : Karma? Chicken? Alan, what the hell are you talking about?

  [sees Naomi] 

  Charlie Harper : Ewww...

  [yelling to the back room] 

  Charlie Harper : Charlie, it's for you!

• Alan Harper : [notices Jake after confessing his fetish to Charlie]  How long have you been standing there?

  Jake Harper : Long enough to get very confused. So, we have hot dogs, right?