The L Word (TV Series)

Lassoed (2007)

Jennifer Beals: Bette Porter

Photos 

Quotes 

• Bette Porter : [speaking rapidly with a lowered voice]  Girls, girls, okay, here's the deal: Phyllis Kroll, Executive Vice Chancellor of California University, very accomplished, very dignified, very much my boss, I repeat, very much my boss. She's been married twenty five years and is now at this relatively late date convinced she's a lesbian and is peeking out of the closet as we speak, so please, please, please be nice to her and try to talk to her and try not to make her feel like she's the oldest fucking lesbian on the planet.

  [gets up] 

  Bette Porter : Phyllis! Hi, it's good to see you.

• Alice Pieszecki : Phyllis.

  Phyllis Kroll , Bette Porter : Alice?

  Alice Pieszecki : [to Bette]  Hello, Professor Porter.

  Phyllis Kroll : Dean Porter, Alice. You're demoting her.

• Nadia : [seeing Bette rub her shoulder]  Do you have a knot? Do you want me to unlock it?

  Bette Porter : Uh... it... it's okay. No, really, it's fine.

  Nadia : [rubbing Bette's shoulders anyway]  Oh, wow. You are really tight. God, do you feel that? It's right there.

  Bette Porter : [whispering]  Nadia, please...

  Nadia : Do you want me to find you a body worker? Because, oh my gosh, I have the most amazing Ayurvedic healer, and he, he went so deep...

  Bette Porter : I, uh, I'd prefer a woman.

  [Bette's embarrassed and realizes what she just blurted out] 

  Nadia : [a beat]  Well. That can be arranged, Dean Porter.

• Bette Porter : I just need to find out, uh, what conferences C.U. has hosted. I know that we did the Global Sustainability last August...

  Nadia : Where Dr. Gorsham sustained multiple hickeys from his two teaching assistants.

  Bette Porter : You mean he slept with both of them?

  Nadia : Don't be shocked. It happens all the time.

  Bette Porter : Well, that doesn't make it acceptable.

  Nadia : No, but we're all adults, Bette. I mean, in a cloistered environment like a university, it would be absurd to think that there weren't relationships between faculty and students.

• Phyllis Kroll : Bette, did you just say something about a crazy, hot, women's party?

  Bette Porter : My sister Kit she owns The Planet in West Hollywood. They're dong this party called "Rancho Notorious".

  Phyllis Kroll : And it's all women?

  Bette Porter : Only Thursday's. Thursday is girls' night at the planet.

  Phyllis Kroll : Would it be too much of an imposition if I asked to join you?

• Tina Kennard : [regarding Henry's house]  Yeah, it's fine. I'd re-model it but I don't live here.

  Bette Porter : [deadpan]  Yet.

• Woman At Party : Your daughter is adorable.

  Bette Porter : [looking at Angelica's picture]  Thank you.

  Woman At Party : What would you do if one day she decided to that she wanted to live with her Father?

  Tina Kennard : We don't call him the Father; we call him the donor.

• Brad : Look, I'm not a homophobe, you know what I'm saying? But, uh... Look, if my son came home and he told me that he was gay... I mean, I'm sure I would come around to it but... You know, at first there would be a reaction and... I'm sorry, I'm just trying to be honest here, alright?

  Bette Porter : An honest homophobe, how nice.

  Tina Kennard : Bette, don't get into it.

  Bette Porter : No, I... I understand, Brad. I mean, you find gay sex repulsive and you don't care about your son's personal happiness as much as you do for your own comfort level. Right?

• Bette Porter : [about Phyllis]  I can't believe she actually came.

• Bette Porter : [to Alice]  We have a situation, Alice.

• Bette Porter : [to Alice]  My boss is attracted to you.

  Alice Pieszecki : Really?

• [last lines] 

  Nadia : Would it be wrong if I told you, I have never wanted to kiss someone more than I want to kiss you right now.

  Bette Porter : Nadia.

• Phyllis Kroll : I especially loved Alice. She's so vibrant.

  Bette Porter : Yeah, she's a great girl.

  Phyllis Kroll : So, do you think she liked me?