Family Guy (TV Series)

Bango Was His Name Oh! (2006)

Alex Borstein: Lois Griffin, Tricia Takanawa, Customer #1, Andrea, Old Lady

Photos 

Quotes 

• Lois Griffin : Chris find yourself a girl who smokes. Remember, if she smokes, she pokes.

• Peter Griffin : Ah, sweet, Quagmire! You got a Winnebago.

  Glenn Quagmire : You mean a wanna-bang-o!

  Lois Griffin : [fake chuckle]  Oh, how clever.

  Glenn Quagmire : Yeah, I'm gonna take her across the country and nail a different broad in every state. Also gonna go to Vegas.

  Peter Griffin : Oh, we went to Vegas once. Remember, Lois? We saw the Jew Man Group?

• Tom Tucker : We now go live to the streets of San Francisco with Asian reporter Tricia Takanawa. Diane, is she Chinese or Japanese?

  Diane Simmons : She's Japanese, Tom.

  Tom Tucker : Wow. I know a Japanese woman.

  Tricia Takanawa : Tom, I'm standing here amidst the heated debate over a recent petition to change the name of the city from San Francisco to something a little less gay.

• Peter Griffin : [in the bathtub]  Care to join me, Lois?

  Lois Griffin : [giggling]  Ohh... uh, Peter, how am I supposed to...

  Peter Griffin : Oh, oh, oh, sorry, sorry. Where are my manners?

  Lois Griffin : [he pulls back his belly fat]  Oh, what a gentleman.

  Peter Griffin : [she gets in]  There you go.

  Lois Griffin : [letting go, his stomach smacks her in the face, and she hits her head on the tub faucet]  Ahh!

  Peter Griffin : Oh, oh, God! Oh, you okay? You all right, honey?

• Chris Griffin : Mom, Meg says Omar Sharif is dead, but I think she's thinking of Anthony Quinn.

  Lois Griffin : [covering herself]  Chris, your father and I are in the tub. And, Meg, you are thinking of Anthony Quinn. Now, get out!

  [they leave] 

  Lois Griffin : Peter, this is ridiculous. We have no privacy here. We gotta get those kids out of the house once in a while. I mean, shouldn't they be dating?

  Peter Griffin : Eh, that doesn't solve the problem, Lois. If they start dating, I mean, their-their rooms are right next to each other, they'll start having sex, we'll never get 'em out of the house, and...

  Lois Griffin : No, no, no. You idiot, I'm talking about them dating other people.

• Peter Griffin : Kids, your mother and I have decided that we're gonna help you two get out in the dating world.

  Lois Griffin : That's right. Chris, I'm gonna show you how to be an affable, desirable young man who doesn't smell like the inside of a wool hat.

  Chris Griffin : Why you gotta break balls?

  Peter Griffin : And, Meg, when I get through with you, you're gonna be beating guys off with both hands.

  Meg Griffin : This is gonna be so fun.

  Peter Griffin : Hey! Zip it. Rule number one: no speaky until the man speaky to you.