- Al: What a nice little town we live in. Neighborhood's burning down, no cops. There's a robbery, no cops. I start my car, here comes the Bundy squad.
- Al: [ironically] Oh no, that's my pleasure Peg, even though my rates will skyrocket
- [to Kelly]
- Al: because you're underage and I'm paying a special rate for
- [glances at Peg]
- Al: the bumper-car queen over here...
- Kelly: [smiling emotionally] Well, I know why you don't want me to drive and it's not the insurance. Your little girl is growing up and you can't bear to let her go, huh?
- [Kelly wraps her arms around Al]
- Al: No, it's the insurance.
- Al: No, this too: right now your daddy's a little irritated, because you cost your daddy 500 freaking dollars, but more important than that - well, not more important than that but as important - you've showed me how little you care. So tomorrow, when I go to get my license...
- Kelly: Who's taking you, Dad?
- Al: I'll crawl on my face. When I come home, your daddy is not going to give you anything: not a smile, no money, no food... I'm not going to lift a finger to help any of you and I don't expect any of you to lift a finger to help me. From now on, we have a new Bundy rule: every man for himself.
- Al: Hey, Steve?
- [chuckles]
- Al: You know that two feet, three inches? Well, it was just big enough that a cop spotted me and gave me another ticket for a broken tail-light.
- Steve: Well, I warned you, Al.
- Al: [chuckling] Yeah, oh yeah. You know, me and you just have to go hunting one day. Yeah, I'll get you a pair of antlers to wear.
- Peggy: [writing] Saturday, eleven p.m.: make love. 11:05: Al goes to sleep. 11:06: Finish making love.
- Marcy Rhoades: So you're finally getting your license, huh? You're going to love it, Kelly. Driving gives you real independence.
- Kelly: Yeah. I know what you mean. You know, I was really getting sick of that "Put out or get out" stuff.
- Kelly: Well, two guys are fighting over me down by the train tracks today. You know, it really wouldn't look right if I wasn't there.