- Corey Haim: [yawn] Good morning! What are we gonna do today, Corey Feldman?
- Corey Feldman: Same thing we do every day, Corey Haim. We save the world.
- [dancing naked in front of some pets]
- Naked Man: [singing] This is how I dance when I'm not wearing underpants! Nothing I like more than to dance and I'm not gonna wear no pants! You can't make me...
- Moses: God has blessed me with 10 irrefutable commandments for living!
- Follower: Anything on there about not pushing your religion onto other people?
- Moses: No.
- Follower: Didn't think so.
- Moses: Number one: He who smelt it, dealt it.
- [followers all burst into laughter]
- Moses: What? What's so funny? Stop it! Stop laughing!
- Jenna Bush: [trapped in a crate] Let us out!
- Barbara Bush: Damn you to hell, Corey Haim and Corey Feldman!
- Jenna Bush: My dad's the president! I'm gonna get you buried in oil, and then I'm gonna have my daddy invade you!
- Barbara Bush: My dad will get you hurt! Yeah, how'd you like to have your ass kicked by Halli-b-burton or Halliblurton?
- Jenna Bush: Ha ha ha!
- Barbara Bush: Think Jenna, we're like old apples tied up to a bag of shit.
- Jenna Bush: It's dark! I got to go to the bathroom!