Scrubs (TV Series)

His Story III (2006)

Zach Braff: Dr. John 'J.D.' Dorian

Quotes 

• [JD is making a video project to send to his mother] 

  J.D. : Dr. Cox, do you have anything you'd like to say to my mom?

  Dr. Cox : No, but I have something I'd like to say to her uterus, because it brought you into this world.

  [Smacks camera and shakes finger] 

  Dr. Cox : Bad uterus! Don't do that anymore!

• Dr. Cox : [Dr. Cox and JD examine a patient with locked-in syndrome, who communicates via computer]  Go ahead and check Mr. McNair's blood pressure, please, Eva.

  Mr. McNair : I don't get it - Why does he call you a girl's name?

  J.D. : Thank you for asking, Mr. McNair. You see, the thing about Dr. Cox is that, the closer he feels to a person, the more he needs to push them away. So when he calls me Eva, he's actually saying, "JD, I care about you!" Vulnerable people like Dr. Cox...

  Mr. McNair : Oh my god! I get it now, Carol. Carol, Carol, Carol, Carol, Carol, Carol, Carol, Carol...

  J.D. : Now you're being a jerk! Jerk! Jerk!

  Dr. Cox : Newbie! I'm relatively certain that the computer is broken.

  J.D. : Oh, my bad.