Scrubs (TV Series)

His Story III (2006)

John C. McGinley: Dr. Perry Cox

Quotes 

• Dr. Cox : You're black? 'Cause last I checked you had a nerdy white best friend, you enjoy Neil Diamond, and you damn sure act like a black guy and these are all characteristics of white guys. Please understand, I'm a huge supporter of the NAACP. If you're don't know what that stands for, it's the National Association for the Advancement of Colored People. And quite frankly, I always thought they should change the 'colored people' to 'African Americans' but then of course it wouldn't be the NAACP it'd be the N quad A or NAAAA. And I know this probably sounds like a digression but actually brings me back to my original point... Do I think you're black? Naaaaaaaaa!

• Nurse Laverne Roberts : Dr. Turk is not aware that Lonnie was all-conference at Villanova.

  Dr. Cox : Laverne, would you go ahead and thank what's-his-name for me.

  Nurse Laverne Roberts : Jesus?

  Dr. Cox : That's him.

• [JD is making a video project to send to his mother] 

  J.D. : Dr. Cox, do you have anything you'd like to say to my mom?

  Dr. Cox : No, but I have something I'd like to say to her uterus, because it brought you into this world.

  [Smacks camera and shakes finger] 

  Dr. Cox : Bad uterus! Don't do that anymore!

• Dr. Cox : [Dr. Cox and JD examine a patient with locked-in syndrome, who communicates via computer]  Go ahead and check Mr. McNair's blood pressure, please, Eva.

  Mr. McNair : I don't get it - Why does he call you a girl's name?

  J.D. : Thank you for asking, Mr. McNair. You see, the thing about Dr. Cox is that, the closer he feels to a person, the more he needs to push them away. So when he calls me Eva, he's actually saying, "JD, I care about you!" Vulnerable people like Dr. Cox...

  Mr. McNair : Oh my god! I get it now, Carol. Carol, Carol, Carol, Carol, Carol, Carol, Carol, Carol...

  J.D. : Now you're being a jerk! Jerk! Jerk!

  Dr. Cox : Newbie! I'm relatively certain that the computer is broken.

  J.D. : Oh, my bad.

• Nurse Carla Espinosa : Wow... aren't you the big bad ass attending?

  Dr. Elliot Reid : Yeah, well, it's time for them to sink or swim. I got to where I am on my own, OK?

  Nurse Carla Espinosa : Nobody helped you out in the beginning, huh?

  Dr. Elliot Reid : Dr Cox was my attending. He was nice enough to keep track of the times he made me cry.

  Dr. Cox : [passing by, counting and moving his fingers]  27, counting this morning.

  Dr. Elliot Reid : Mh... yeah. I'm PMSing and he made fun of my shoes.