South Park (TV Series)

Cartman Joins NAMBLA (2000)

Trey Parker: Stan Marsh, Eric Cartman, Tony, F.B.I. Agent, Mr. Garrison, Officer Barbrady, Dr. Mephesto, NAMBLA Member, TV Announcer, Woman on Commercial, Bobby, Dr. Doctor, Patrick, Mr. Harris, Timmy, SWAT, Marlon Brando Lookalike #1, Marlon Brando Lookalike #2, Marlon Brando Lookalike #3

Quotes 

• [Mr. Eduardo defends himself, and the members of NAMBLA] 

  Kyle : Dude, you have *sex* with *children*.

  Stan : Yeah, you know, we believe in equality for everybody, and tolerance, and all that gay stuff, but dude, fuck you.

  Kyle : Seriously.

• Eric Cartman : Okay, we'll try this again.

  [types on the computer] 

  Eric Cartman : 'Hi everyone. I am a young boy looking for fun times with older male. I like to...

  [lots of dialogue boxes pop up at once] 

  Eric Cartman : Oh, this one looks good. "HungDaddy".

  [types back] 

  Eric Cartman : 'Hello, HungDaddy.'

  [gets immediate response] 

  Eric Cartman : [reading the answer]  "Hi. I'm eight and a half inches". Damn dude, this guy's tiny! He must be a dwarf.

  [types back] 

  Eric Cartman : 'Sorry, I'm not interested in being friends with midgets. Midgets piss me off.' Frowny face.

• Mr. Eduardo (Member of NAMBLA) : All these men wanted was love from a young boy. There is nothing wrong with love.

  Mr. Garrison : I do not want love from a young boy. I like men my own age. Ah! I mean, I like women! What did I say? Oh God! I love titties!

• Cartman : [chatting with an older man]  "I'm eight and a half inches." Whoa, this guy's tiny. He must be a dwarf.

  [types] 

  Cartman : "I don't want to be friends with a midget. Midgets piss me off." Frowny-face.

• Eric Cartman : Well, I guess nowadays, they allow any old schmuck into NAMBLA.