- Raphael: [noticing April arriving at the lair wearing a yellow ball gown, high heels, diamond earrings, a jeweled necklace, makeup, and her hair styled differently] Wow!, talk about embraceable! Who is that?
- April O'Neil: Hi guys, it's me.
- Donatello: Gosh, April, you look just like a... a girl!
- Leonardo: You look lovely!
- Michelangelo: Truly tubuloso!
- Raphael: Yeah, you clean up real good!
- Splinter: [also enamored] April, you make this ancient rodent feel young again
- April O'Neil: Thanks, guys! You're just a bunch of big green sweeties, and you're the nicest rodent I know! And now I'm off to the Malcurian Embassy to cover a fancy party!
- Leonardo: [as April leaves for the party] I think we should keep an eye on her!
- Donatello: Better yet, two!
- Michelangelo: Mondo notion dude!
- Raphael: Well, what are we waiting for? Let's go!
- [they all run for the exit and fight over who gets out first]
- April O'Neil: [puts on Princess Mallory's pink dress, white gloves and crown, then hears the turtle com] Oh, what a time for the Turtle Com!
- [answers it]
- April O'Neil: April here, what's up?
- Donatello: [worried] April, are you alright? We just spotted Shredder and his two hench mutants!
- April O'Neil: Aw, you fellas are so sweet to worry about me. I'm in Princess Mallory's room on the trail of a hot story so...
- [Shredder, Bebop, and Rocksteady break into the room]
- Shredder: Grab her!
- Rocksteady: With pleasure!
- [picks her up and holds her in his arms]
- April O'Neil: [while hitting him on the head] Let go of me you...
- [Shredder renders her unconscious with a nerve pinch to the neck]
- Donatello: April? April? April, answer me!
- April O'Neil: [wakes up, holds her head] Ohhhh!
- [notices Rocksteady carrying her over his shoulder]
- April O'Neil: Oh, let me go you slobbering beast! Just wait until the Turtles get their hands on you!
- Shredder: Wait, that voice... it sounds familiar!
- [uncovers April's hair and gets a better look at her face]
- Shredder: Just as I thought! This isn't Princess Mallory, you moronic mutants, it's April O'Neil!
- Rocksteady: The dame reporter? What are we going to do, boss?
- Shredder: We're going to make the best of a bad situation!
- [grabs April by the arm and drags her away]
- April O'Neil: Shredder, everywhere you go is a bad situation!
- April O'Neil: [encounters two doors] One of these doors should lead to the roof, but which one?
- [opens one]
- April O'Neil: Maybe it's this one...
- Shredder: [emerges from the door imitating a game show host] You should've tried Door Number Two!
- [April slams the door shut, she tries the other door...]
- Rockstedy: [grabs her] Gotcha!
- Shredder: You may not be the princess, but you look enough like her to ensure our safe getaway if you keep that pretty little mouth shut!
- April O'Neil: Not a chance, Shredder!
- Shredder: As you wish!
- [pulls out a gag]
- April O'Neil: I sure hope that's clean!
- [Shredder ties the gag around her mouth, then carries her away]
- Raphael: [as he's hanging on to Shredder helicopter] Remember kids, we're professionals. Don't try this at home.
- Michelangelo: [interested in what Splinter is eating] Whoa! What is that, sensei?
- Splinter: It is called tekka maki, raw tuna roll. Have some, Michelangelo.
- [offers it to Michelangelo]
- Michelangelo: [disgusted] Whoa! Major gross out, no thanks!
- Splinter: A wise person embraces as many new experiences as possible.
- Leonardo: [offers him some of their pizza] Master Splinter, perhaps you would like to try some pizza? It's marshmallow and pepperoni.
- Splinter: [disgusted] Uh, the wise person also realizes some experiences are less embraceable than others.