- [last lines; Homer is in traction, sharing Captain Lance Murdock's hospital room]
- Homer Simpson: You think you got guts? Try raising my kids.
- Dr. Hibbert: This little boy broke his leg trying to fly like Superman. This boy's brother hit him in the head with a wrench, mimicking a recent TV wrestling match. I won't even subject you to the horrors of our Three Stooges ward.
- Marge Simpson: Gee, I never realized TV was such a dangerous influence.
- Dr. Hibbert: Well, as tragic as all this is, it's a small price to pay for countless hours of top-notch entertainment.
- Homer Simpson: Amen!
- Bart Simpson: [Homer stops Bart from jumping Springfield Gorge] I love you, Dad.
- Homer Simpson: I love you too Son, I...
- [Homer takes off on the skateboard across the gorge]
- Homer Simpson: AHHHH!
- [Thinking he might make it]
- Homer Simpson: I'm gonna make it! I'm gonna make it! This is the greatest thrill of my life! I'm king of the world! Woohoo! Woohoo! I...
- [Falls down Springfield Gorge]
- Homer Simpson: AHHHHHHH!
- Otto Mann: You know, Bart, as the only adult here I feel I should say something:
- Bart Simpson: What?
- Otto Mann: Cooooolll!
- Otto Mann: Man, this things pretty gnarly. I bet you could throw a dead body in there and no one would ever find it.