The Simpsons (TV Series)

When Flanders Failed (1991)

Dan Castellaneta: Homer Simpson, Barney Gumble, Canadian Football League Announcer, Ned's Friend #3, Itchy, George Washington in Advert, Husband

Quotes 

• Lisa Simpson : Dad, do you know what Schadenfreude is?

  Homer Simpson : No, I don't know what "shaden-frawde" is.

  [sarcastic] 

  Homer Simpson : Please tell me, because I'm dying to know.

  Lisa Simpson : It's a German term for "shameful joy", taking pleasure in the suffering of others.

  Homer Simpson : Oh, come on Lisa. I'm just glad to see him fall flat on his butt!

  [getting mad] 

  Homer Simpson : He's usually all happy and comfortable, and surrounded by loved ones, and it makes me feel... What's the opposite of that shameful joy thing of yours?

  Lisa Simpson : Sour grapes.

  Homer Simpson : Boy, those Germans have a word for everything!

• Homer Simpson : Stupid family going to stupid Flanders' stupid barbecue. What if they got back and I was dead from not eating? Then they'd be sorry. They'd say, "Oh no, why did we go to Flanders barbecue? Why did we leave Homer all alone without any food?" And I'd be laughing. Laughing from my grave. Heh heh heh.

• Homer Simpson : I don't care if Ned Flanders IS the nicest guy in the world. He's a jerk. End of story.

• Chuck Ellis : Good afternoon, sir. I'm Chuck Ellis from the Springfield Collection Agency, and I'm here to ask you why you don't think you need to pay your bills?

  Homer Simpson : Oh, I know I need to pay them, but there's just so many!

  Chuck Ellis : Does it make you feel good about yourself to owe people money? We've been very patient with you, Mr. Flanders.

  Homer Simpson : I know, but... Wait a minute. I'm Homer Simpson. Ned Flanders lives over there.

  Chuck Ellis : Oh.

  Homer Simpson : Flanders is in debt? Are you sure?

  Chuck Ellis : [chuckles]  We don't make mistakes.

  [writes in his notebook] 

  Chuck Ellis : Damned right-handed ledgers. I can't write in these things.

  Homer Simpson : But there's a store where you...

  Chuck Ellis : Hey, you said you're Homer Simpson?

  Homer Simpson : Yeah.

  Chuck Ellis : See you on Thursday.

  Homer Simpson : D'oh!

• Bart Simpson : You're it.

  Girl Playing Tag : Electricity.

  Bart Simpson : Nuh-uh. No electricity. Electricity only in freeze tag.

  Girl Playing Tag : Okay. Now you're it!

  Homer Simpson : Hey! No tag-backs!

  Bart Simpson : Yeah, you cheater.

  Girl Playing Tag : You lie like a fly with a booger in its eye.

  Homer Simpson : Hee hee hee! The fly was funny and the booger was the icing on the cake.