- Homer Simpson: You can't enjoy money when you're dead, so why not have fun now?
- Marge Simpson: Don't you think you've had enough fun? Last year you spent five thousand dollars on donuts, two thousand on scalp massages, five hundred on body glitter.
- Homer Simpson: Hey, I earned that money. While you lounge around here doing laundry and putting up drywall, I'm at work busting my hump.
- Marge Simpson: Oh, please! From what I hear, you waltz in there at ten thirty, take a nap on the toilet, then sit around Googling your own name until lunch.
- Homer Simpson: Who told you that?
- Marge Simpson: You shouted it while we were making love!
- Lisa Simpson: [looking at map] Let's see, the RV dealership is across the freeway on the corner of - -hey, this is a Flintstones Fun Map. Look, Dad wrote something: Dino, short for Dinosaur? Remember to ask Jeeves.
- Bart Simpson: French it up, lover boy.
- Homer Simpson: I'm not a machine. I can't just turn it on.
- Marge Simpson: Oh come here.
- [Marge grabs Homer and start French kissing]
- Marge Simpson: Now pull over!
- Bart Simpson: First, raise my allowance.
- Homer Simpson: WHY YOU LITTLE!
- [Starts strangling Bart while driving]
- Bart Simpson: [during their parents' nasty argument] You know what started all this trouble? This motor home. How can a vehicle this cool destroy a marriage that crappy?
- Lisa Simpson: [thinking fast] Hey, I know this is a crazy idea, but hear me out. What if we...
- Bart Simpson: [behind the wheel] Take this back to the dealer?
- Lisa Simpson: Wow, I was gonna say "Call Reverend Lovejoy," but I guess this could work.
- [they proceed to drive the RV]
- Marge Simpson: [having just sent away Homer's posse of motorhomes] You don't belong on the lawn. You belong in your bed with your wife.
- Homer Simpson: [fed up with Marge's overbearing attitude] That's no marriage bed. It's a loveless slab of bossiness!
- Marge Simpson: [gasps, hurt by Homer's words] Well, you're not perfect either!
- Homer Simpson: Name one way I'm not.
- [a bout of exchanging insults ensues]