The Simpsons (TV Series)

Homer vs. Dignity (2000)

Hank Azaria: Maitre D', Chief Wiggum, Carl, Comic Book Guy, Moe Szyslak, Costington, Professor Frink

Quotes 

• Comic Book Guy : [eating Peeps]  If only real chicks went down this easy.

• Mr. Costington : Why, I don't think I've ever seen such generosity. You're a modern day Kris Kringle, sir.

  Homer Simpson : I'm just trying to dig myself out of a pit of shame.

  Mr. Costington : Say no more. I've had a bit of a shoe-sniffing problem myself. I'm... still not allowed on the third floor.

  Homer Simpson : [giving a hug]  It's okay...

• Financial planner : You haven't set aside anything for retirement.

  Chief Wiggum : Oh, you know how it is with cops. I'll get shot 3 days before retirement. In the business we call it "retirony".

  Financial planner : ...What if you don't get shot?

  Chief Wiggum : What a terrible thing to say - now look, you've made my wife cry!