At the moment of writing, the User Rating for this episode is 6.2 but the only review anyone has submitted praises this episode worthy of 9 stars. Which rating to believe? Let's examine the episode.
Joxer arrives at the crucifixion site too late to help Xena and Gabrielle and runs into Amarice and Eli. Together they decide to get the bodies down and transport them back to Greek for a proper burial. So far, so good. Until we meet the souls of Xena and Gabrielle perched on top of some heavenly pillars. They witness a host of angels. The CGI of the host is pretty good, but the practical effects of the angels who lift Gabrielle and Xena are *horribly clumsy*. We are about to witness a story where the ambition of the makers *way* exceeds their resources to pull it off. They have forgotten the Most Important Rule in TV Storytelling: "If you don't have the budget for it, DO NOT FILM THE SCRIPT." A perfect example of knowing one's limitations is what just might be the highest ratio of result in comparison to the budget: James Cameron's ALIENS. He wasn't even allowed for a full 2.35:1 aspect ratio like Ridley Scott and the others, but still, through clever filming techniques and canny editing, delivered a film that looks twice as expensive as it was. The point is that the makers of Xena should *never* even have attempted what clearly is a movie scale story. I mean, The Heavenly Host versus The Legions of Hell? On TV budget? WTF were they thinking? If you haven't seen this episode, prepare for embarrassing effects and the battle of Heaven vs. Hell being represented by *only* about a dozen angels and a dozen demons. Ridiculous! Then there's the problem from the previous season. Callisto comes from Greek background, but suddenly her "lord" is the ruler of Hell (never actually called by name, but obvious from Archangel Michael's tales that Callisto is talking about Lucifer). Likewise, Xena and Gabrielle are headed for Heaven, not The Elysian Fields. WTF? But the damage was already done in "The Ides of March" and cannot be undone. The internal consistency of the Xena Universe has collapsed.
Luckily the fiery Amarice is once again in great form, stabbing Roman soldiers to death with abandon. And the scene where Joxer, Amarice and Eli take Xena and Gabrielle's lifeless, cold bodies down from the crosses is probably the darkest, desolate scene in the whole run of Xena. The music is spot on and the slow motion is used to great effect. Amarice's soliloquy is also very touching. And when she lays the blame of Xena and Gabrielle's death on Eli, it's hard to argue against her logic. But then again, Eli has always been a useless believer in pacifism. Sadly, the events down on Earth are about all that is good about this episode.
We are shown that one can become an Archangel by walking through the "fire of purification"? WTF? How did the Guardian Angels come to be? Can they become Archangels? If so, why don't they? There is no logic here! Down in Hell, where Callisto has taken Gabrielle, we have just a small moment of great irony when Gabrielle starts to turn into a demon and taunts Callisto. Then, of course, Michael, Xena and the Not-So-Dirty Dozen arrive and rescue Gabrielle. The heavenly waters wash away the demon seed in her, but Xena decides to redeem herself by saving Callisto's soul at the cost of her own. It's the only good twist in the story and also the only one that makes sense - Xena is desperate for redemption and after all that has happened, there are no other options for her to redeem herself.
Of course, Xena didn't think things through: When she exchanges places with Callisto, she becomes a demon intent on conquering Heaven. Erm, what happened to the "lord" Callisto was serving in Hell? His Infernal Majesty is completely sidelined. Also, Callisto does not become an angel even though Xena becomes a demon - Callisto simply becomes a pure soul, with no memory of the events starting from the moment Xena's forces killed her family. Then Michael tells Gabrielle that as a mortal, Xena was almost a match for him, but now that she's a demon, she may be his superior. Ehh... what? A mortal is almost a match for an Archangel? Some Angels these are! Then, Gabrielle gains her Angel wings and Xena's demons assault. The battle desperately tries to be epic but comes off just embarrassing. To make things worse the battle is inter-cut with Eli making a speech for God and waiting for a sign from Him. Then Callisto gets Angel wings and appears to Eli. Do they just hand the wings to anyone who happens to be available? Eli prays at the bodies of Xena and Gabrielle. And lo and behold, Callisto gives them a touch of an Angel and the souls of Xena and Gabrielle return to their bodies before Demon Xena manages to take Gabrielle back to Hell. Honestly, all this zipping up and down between Heaven and Hell is just for somehow filling the running time. Also, it is never explicitly explained how Xena and Gabrielle's mauled and frozen bodies were restored back to their prime, but hey, God did it - He can do anything! Which begs the question: What was the point of this all? The only thing that changes is Callisto's torment - her soul is reunited with her family. The fact that she returns the favor by resurrecting Xena and Gabrielle (although Callisto is just a channel for God's power) is a lame way of solving the problem of their dramatic death on the cross. Oh, and it also robs "The Ides of March" its punch. Great work, dumb-asses! 5/10.
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