The West Wing (TV Series)

Pilot (1999)

David Sage: John Van Dyke

Quotes 

• John Van Dyke : If our children can buy pornography on any street corner for five dollars, isn't that too high a price to pay for free speech?

  President Josiah Bartlet : No.

  John Van Dyke : Really?

  President Josiah Bartlet : On the other hand, I think that five dollars is too high a price to pay for pornography.

• John Van Dyke : The First Commandment says "Honor thy father."

  Toby Ziegler : No it doesn't.

  Josh Lyman : Toby...

  Toby Ziegler : It doesn't!

  Josh Lyman : Listen...

  Toby Ziegler : No! If I'm going to make you sit through this preposterous exercise, we're going to get the names of the damn commandments right.

  Mary Marsh : Okay. Here we go.

  Toby Ziegler : "Honor thy father" is the Third Commandment.

  John Van Dyke : Then what's the First Commandment?

  President Josiah Bartlet : "I am the Lord your God. Thou shalt worship no other god before me." Boy, those were the days, huh?

• Mary Marsh : School prayer, pornography, condoms - what's it gonna be?

  Toby Ziegler : We're not prepared to make any sort of a deal right now.

  Josh Lyman : Sure we are. M-Mary, I...

  Mary Marsh : My read of the landscape is that you're cleaning out your desk before the end of business today, so I'd just as soon negotiate with Toby if it's all the same to you.

  Rev. Al Caldwell : Mary...

  Mary Marsh : Please allow me to work.

  [turning to Josh] 

  Mary Marsh : It was only a matter of time with you, Josh. That New York sense of humor was just a little...

  Rev. Al Caldwell : Mary, there's no need to...

  Mary Marsh : Reverend, please! They think they're so much smarter! They think it's smart talk, but nobody else does.

  Josh Lyman : I'm actually from Connecticut. But that's neither here nor there; the point is, Mary, I...

  Toby Ziegler : She meant "Jewish."

  [heavy silence] 

  Toby Ziegler : When she said "New York sense of humor." She was talking about you and me.

  Josh Lyman : You know what, Toby, let's not even go there.

  Rev. Al Caldwell : There's been an apology. Let's move on.

  John Van Dyke : I'd like to discuss why we hear so much talk about the First Amendment coming out of this building but no talk at all about the First Commandment.

  Mary Marsh : I don't like what I've just been accused of.

  Toby Ziegler : I'm afraid that's just tough, Mrs. Marsh!