Two and a Half Men (TV Series)

Does This Smell Funny to You (2005)

Charlie Sheen: Charlie Harper

Quotes 

• Norman : Can I give you a little advice, kid?

  Charlie Harper : Sure.

  Norman : I was a player once, like you.

  Charlie Harper : Do tell.

  Norman : Does the name "Tuesday Weld" mean anything to you?

  Charlie Harper : No.

  Norman : Joey Heatherton?

  Norman : The immortal Miss Anne Francis? TV's Honey West?

  Charlie Harper : Sorry.

  Norman : Well, look 'em up on your internet. They were all hot and I nailed 'em.

  Charlie Harper : Really? Well, kudos.

  Norman : But nothing lasts forever. There's going to come a time when you'll want to settle down. I only hope you don't make the same mistake I did. I picked a young hottie 'cause I figured if I was gonna die, it'd be in the sack, with a smile on my face.

  Charlie Harper : That's my retirement plan.

  Norman : But it doesn't work that way. What happens is... you get your heart broken, and you wind up having a coffee klatsch with some putz who never heard of Honey West.