That '70s Show (TV Series)

Tornado Prom (2002)

Ashton Kutcher: Michael Kelso

Quotes 

• Jackie Burkhart : [Begins the "Wizard of Oz" dream sequence as Dorothy]  Oh, Toto. Losing "Snow Queen" has left me searching for guidance. Surely, the Wizard of Oz can help.

  [Stops walking as she meets Kelso, as the Scarecrow] 

  Michael Kelso : Jackie, why'd you make me the Scarecrow? He needs a brain!

  Jackie Burkhart : No, no. I made you the Scarecrow because you love chasing birds.

  Michael Kelso : I *do* love chasing birds.

  [Both of them start walking together but stop when they meet Hyde, as the Tin Man] 

  Steven Hyde : Is this some kind of joke, 'cause I'm not laughing! Kelso's the Scarecrow?

  [chuckles] 

  Steven Hyde : Yeah.

  [the three of them start walking together but stop when they meet Fez, as the Cowardly Lion] 

  Fez : Look, guys! I'm a bear!

  Jackie Burkhart : Fez, you're the Cowardly Lion.

  Fez : But, I want to be a bear.

  Michael Kelso : At least you have a brain.

  Steven Hyde : This sucks.

  Jackie Burkhart : Oh, will everyone just shut up? When it's your dream, you can be whatever you want!

  Fez : I want to be a bear.

  [the four of them start walking together but once again stop as they meet Donna, as the Wicked Witch of the West] 

  Donna Pinciotti : Jackie, what the hell?

  [Eric, as the Flying Monkey, shows up] 

  Eric Forman : [laughing]  She totally made you a witch! That's so awesome!

  Donna Pinciotti : She made *you* a flying monkey!

  Eric Forman : What?

  [Checks himself out] 

  Eric Forman : Oh, crap!

  Donna Pinciotti : Let's kick her ass!

  Eric Forman : Yeah!

  [Jackie then screams and runs away as the gang angrily chase after her] 

• Jackie Burkhart : Why am I not "Snow Queen"? For the last two weeks, I was nice to *everybody*. Well, maybe not the A.V. Club, but I mean, come on.

  Michael Kelso : Jackie, you can't just be nice for two weeks. You have to be nice all the time. Or else very handsome.