That '70s Show (TV Series)

Ramble On (2002)

Kurtwood Smith: Red Forman

Quotes 

• Kitty Forman : [the TV remote won't work]  Click, damn it, click!

  Reginald "Red" Forman : Kitty, I think your "lady problem" is acting up again.

  Kitty Forman : No, just the clicker, is all! It's supposed to click! It's a clicker, that's what it does!

  Reginald "Red" Forman : I think it's time for a nap.

  Eric Forman : [Eric enters the living room]  Guys! Really important! Donna's coming over and I lost the ring she gave me!

  Reginald "Red" Forman : Eric, your mother is having a nervous breakdown.

  Kitty Forman : The only thing having a breakdown is the clicker! Why won't it click? Nothing loves me!

  Donna Pinciotti : [entering the living room]  Okay, Eric, Jackie told me you hate the ring!

  Eric Forman : Uh-oh...

  Donna Pinciotti : I happen to think its beautiful! That's what a man-ring looks like!

  Eric Forman : Maybe I'm just not a man-ring kind of guy. I mean, I like man-pants and man-shirts.

  Donna Pinciotti : Why didn't you just tell me you hated it when I gave it to you? Just give it back to me.

  Eric Forman : I absolutely will. Just as soon as I find it.

  Donna Pinciotti : What? How could you lose it? I told you it was a symbol of our loving freaking relationship!

  Eric Forman : And my losing it symbolizes how much I love and respect you?

  [Donna storms out of the room] 

  Reginald "Red" Forman : Eric! Quick! Get me compound presses and a Bloody Mary! Your mother is talking about adopting a communist orphan! I need help! *Move*, damn it!

• Donna Pinciotti : This entire room is an example of bad taste!

  [Kitty and Red walk into the living room] 

  Kitty Forman : Excuse me?

  Donna Pinciotti : Mrs. Forman?

  Kitty Forman : I have spent years picking out every item in this room, surrounding myself with the things I love and the people I thought loved me!

  Reginald "Red" Forman : Kitty, let's take a nap.

  Kitty Forman : [to Red]  And have you fixed the damn clicker yet? What good is a clicker if it won't click?

  [Kitty throws the remote onto the coffee table, causing it to bounce onto the floor, where she stomps on it] 

• [Kitty is crying because she won't be able to have any more kids] 

  Reginald "Red" Forman : Oh, Kitty, it's okay. You've still got Eric. He's sort of a baby. I'll make him cry if you want.

• [Kelso's superhero fantasy] 

  Michael Kelso : [as Batman]  Okay, Super Pals, I'm gonna need a status report.

  Steven Hyde : [as a Wonder Twin, stops making out with Wonder Twin Jackie]  My sensors indicate peace and quiet throughout the universe.

  Fez : [as Aquaman]  The oceans are secure, but I can't check for another 45 minutes because I just ate.

  Eric Forman : [as Superman, entering with Donna as Wonder Woman]  Hey, guys!

  Michael Kelso : Oh, no! You've been brainwashed and forced to wear this hideous ring!

  Donna Pinciotti : Actually, its a gift.

  Steven Hyde : Worst form of gift ever!

  [holds his fist out to the side] 

  Jackie Burkhart : [as the other Wonder Twin]  Shape up!

  [to Wonder Twin Hyde] 

  Jackie Burkhart : I hope he kept the receipt.

  Eric Forman : Alien zombies are attacking the Earth! Let's swing into action, gang!

  Michael Kelso : Hold it, we're still on this ring.

  Steven Hyde : Are you sure it's not an alien artifact?

  Donna Pinciotti : I got it at the mall!

  Reginald "Red" Forman : [Red appears on the video monitor]  Greetings, dumbasses!

  Eric Forman : Uh-oh! It's Dr. Bald!

  Reginald "Red" Forman : My army of alien zombies is invading! Good Lord, that is an *ugly* ring! Alien zombies, get a load of that ring!

  Eric Forman : That's it! This thing's coming off!

  Steven Hyde : Careful, man! You drop something that big and heavy, it'll throw off the Earth's rotation! We'll all go crashing into the sun!

  Michael Kelso : Yeah! Way to use science in a burn!