- Major Lorne: Wow, you must really be some kind of genius.
- Dr. Rodney McKay: Well, as a matter of fact I... eh, wait a minute, why would you say that now?
- Major Lorne: Something has to have kept Colonel Sheppard from shooting you all this time.
- Lt. Colonel John Sheppard: It almost smells like I'm on vacation.
- Dr. Rodney McKay: [putting on sunscreen lotion] Could it be the simulated tropical aroma of cocoa butter?
- Lt. Colonel John Sheppard: Strong enough for anyone within five miles to smell you.
- Dr. Rodney McKay: Like they haven't been tipped off by the Aqua Velva.
- Lt. Colonel John Sheppard: It's dark.
- Dr. Rodney McKay: Yeah, well the sun will be up in 2 hours, 43 minutes and... 10 seconds.
- Lt. Colonel John Sheppard: It's raining.
- Dr. Rodney McKay: So we'll be cold and miserable. Look, the cloud cover will depreciate a small percentage of UV rays but 95 per cent of deadly is still deadly.
- Major Lorne: Dr Parrish said a day or two of exposure wasn't going to kill us.
- Dr. Rodney McKay: And Dr Parrish has a PhD in what? Right, botany!
- Dr. Rodney McKay: What kind of special training do you guys have to go through to get this sort of mission?
- Major Lorne: You guys?
- Dr. Rodney McKay: Yeah, you know... Army, Navy, Air Force, Marines. It's a great place to start.
- Major Lorne: And by "this mission" you mean hunting down a skilled weapons expert hopped up on Wraith drugs in the pitch black of an alien planet?
- Dr. Rodney McKay: Yes.
- Major Lorne: Actually, I skipped that course in Major School.
- Major Lorne: I was hoping Lieutenant Ford might recognize a friendly face and just turn himself in.
- Dr. Rodney McKay: What, you mean me?
- Major Lorne: Well you were friends, weren't you?
- Dr. Rodney McKay: Oh yeah, when we weren't out on harrowing missions we used to hang out together. I'd share my dreams of a self-sustaining fusion and he would talk of how you could sever a man's torso with a P90.
- Dr. Rodney McKay: By my calculation we have been exposed to 327 millisieverts since the sun came up. May not sound like much to you, but I've been keeping a running tally of my lifetime exposure to radiation. X-rays, cellphones, plane rides, the whole unfortunate Genii nuclear reactor thing. My God, last week we flew dangerously close to the corona of a sun. As it is I may have to forgo reproducing.
- Major Lorne: Yeah, it's funny. I was just thinking that might be wise.
- Major Lorne: You know, when they told me I'd be traveling to another galaxy, visiting strange new worlds, defending humanity against unimaginable alien threats, this just is not what I pictured.
- Dr. Parrish: We could be saving Earth right here, right now, Major.
- Major Lorne: Oh, yeah? How's that?
- Dr. Parrish: Through a greater understanding of the long-term effects of severe ozone depletion on plant life. You may not want to admit it, but it's a real danger.
- Major Lorne: Oh, yeah. Sure. Global warming, Wraith attack... I see the similarity now.