The Simpsons (TV Series)

Treehouse of Horror IX (1998)

Regis Philbin: Regis Philbin

Quotes 

• [Bart and Lisa have been zapped inside the TV, and are being chased by Itchy and Scratchy when Homer changes the channel to "Regis & Kathie Lee"] 

  Regis : [cooking soup]  I'm telling you, this cilantro really gives it a zing

  Kathie Lee : Reg, there's no cilantro in it.

  Regis : What?

  [Bart and Lisa fall into the soup, splashing it] 

  Regis : Oh, gosh. This soup is out of control.

  [Itchy and Scratchy fall in, also splashing] 

  Regis : OW! My eyes! My eyes! Oh, God! My beautiful eyes!

  Kathie Lee : That's it! I'm going home. Dom DeLuise can interview himself.

  Regis : My eyes!

• [last lines] 

  Regis : [over the Gracie Films logo]  My eyes! My beautiful eyes!