The Simpsons (TV Series)

Marge Gets a Job (1992)

Dan Castellaneta: Homer Simpson, Jack Barley, Pierre Curie, Grampa, Man in Street, Krusty the Clown, Burns' Imaginary Homer, Groundskeeper Willie

Photos 

Quotes 

• Grampa Simpson : Have you ever read "The Boy Who Cried Wolf"?

  Bart Simpson : I glanced at it. Boy cries wolf, has a few laughs... I forget how it ends.

  Grampa Simpson : [does an annoyed grunt as he approaches a red light]  Bart, is that light green?

  Bart Simpson : Yep!

  Grampa Simpson : It better be!

  [Grampa runs the red light as a pedestrian yells at him] 

• [Willie shares a flask of Scotch with the whipped wolf] 

  Groundskeeper Willie : Ah, don't feel too bad for losin'! I was wrestling wolves when you were at your mother's teat!

• [Marge, Homer, and Lionel Hutz confront Burns in his office] 

  Lionel Hutz : [slams his briefcase down on the desk]  Mr. Burns, we've got witnesses, precedent, and a paper trail a mile long!

  Mr. Burns : Yes? Well, *I* have ten high-priced lawyers.

  [He presses a button, opening a wall panel and revealing his ten lawyers standing in a row. Hutz screams in terror and dashes out of the room] 

  Homer Simpson : He left his briefcase.

  [opens it] 

  Homer Simpson : Hey! It's full of shredded newspaper.

• Groundskeeper Willie : [a wolf is attacking Bart]  Hey, Wolfie! Put down that hors d'oeurve, it's time fer tha main course!

• Homer Simpson : Hey, then I can follow my dream: living in the woods and keeping a journal of my thoughts.

  [imagines it] 

  Homer Simpson : March fifteenth: I wish I brought a TV. Oh, god how I miss TV.

• Mr. Burns : Tonight, we've all come to honor a close friend of ours.

  Homer Simpson : Boring!

  Mr. Burns : A man who provided the Burns Corporation with 45 years of faithful service, Mr. Jack Marley.

  Homer Simpson : Boring!

• Jack Barley : I'm not finished.

  Mr. Burns : Oh, yes you are!

• [Mr. Burns gives Marge an office next to his own] 

  Waylon Smithers : But, sir, that's my office!

  Montgomery Burns : Don't worry, Smithers. I'm putting you where the action is.

  [Cut to Smithers in a men's room, wearing a hairnet and scrubbing one of the urinals with a toothbrush] 

  Waylon Smithers : Springtime fresh, winter white. What could be better?

  [Homer rushes into the men's room and up to the urinal, unzipping his pants] 

  Homer Simpson : Oh, man, I really gotta-!

  Waylon Smithers : NO-OOOO!

• Grampa Simpson : Good news, boy! I found a pharmacy that carries leeches! Well, it wasn't exactly a pharmacy, more of a bait shop.