The Simpsons (TV Series)

Flaming Moe's (1991)

Nancy Cartwright: Bart Simpson, Wanda, Becky, White-Haired Girl, Nelson Muntz, Maggie Simpson

Quotes 

• Moe : Moe's Tavern.

  Bart : Uh, yes, I'm looking for a friend of mine. Last name Jass, first name Hugh.

  Moe : Hold on, I'll check.

  [calls] 

  Moe : Hugh Jass! Hey, I want a Hugh Jass! Oh, somebody check the men's room for a Hugh Jass!

  Hugh Jass : Uh, I'm Hugh Jass.

  Moe : Telephone.

  Hugh Jass : Hello, this is Hugh Jass.

  Bart : Uh, hi.

  Hugh Jass : Who's this?

  Bart : Bart Simpson.

  Hugh Jass : What can I do for you, Bart?

  Bart : Uh, look, I'll level with you, mister. This is a crank call that sorta back-fired, and I'd like to bail out right now.

  Hugh Jass : All right. Better luck next time.

  [hangs up] 

  Hugh Jass : What a nice young man.

• Mrs. Krabappel : Huh! Bart - are those liquire bottles?

  Bart : Brought enough for everybody.

  Mrs. Krabappel : Take those to the teacher's lounge. You can have what's left at the end of the day.

• [Playing "Truth or Dare" at Lisa's slumber party, one of the girls is dared to kiss Bart. She jumps him and does so] 

  Bart : [spluttering]  I'm telling Mom and Dad!

  Lisa Simpson : You're telling who?

  Bart : Mom and Dad!

  Girls : MOM AND DAD? JINX!

  Janey Powell : [singsong]  Now you can't talk, 'til somebody says your name!

  [the girls giggle. Bart runs into the living room, where Homer is watching TV. Bart points emphatically at himself] 

  Homer Simpson : What is it, boy? Is anything the matter, my son? Talk to me, young man.

  [In exasperation, Bart writes "SAY MY NAME" on a pad of paper and shows it to Homer] 

  Homer Simpson : Say your name? Why should I do that, my lad?

  Bart : [exploding]  Because I'm jinxed, damn it!

  [Homer punches him in the arm] 

  Bart : Ow! What was that for?

  Homer Simpson : You talked while you were jinxed, I get to punch you in the arm. It's not my fault, it's the rules.