Sex and the City (TV Series)

Bay of Married Pigs (1998)

Kim Cattrall: Samantha Jones

Quotes 

• Charlotte York : I hate it when you're the only single person at a dinner party and they all look at you like you're a...

  Carrie Bradshaw : Loser?

  Miranda Hobbes : Leper.

  Samantha Jones : Whore.

• Miranda Hobbes : When someone gets married all bets are off, they become married and we become the enemy.

  Carrie Bradshaw : [voice over narration]  As the only single lawyer working at her law firm, Miranda had given this topic some thought.

  Samantha Jones : You know, married women are threatened because we can have sex anytime, anywhere, and with anyone.

  Carrie Bradshaw : We can?

  Samantha Jones : And they're afraid we're gonna have it anytime, anywhere with their husbands.

  Charlotte York : I would never sleep with a married man.

  Samantha Jones : What makes you so sure you haven't? Wedding rings come off you know. Face it ladies, if you're still single, you are not to be trusted.

• Carrie Bradshaw : Okay, I owe you. I didn't know that all of his buddies were gonna be married. Oh, my god, you're doing tequila shots?

  Samantha Jones : [drunk]  You see, that buddy over there? I fucked him. You see that buddy over there? I fucked him too. I never thought I'd see them again.

  Carrie Bradshaw : Well, maybe you should start tagging your married men and that way you can keep track of them.

• Samantha Jones : [drunk, to Carrie, on the possibility that Carrie's boyfriend will propose to her]  If you turn into one of those married assholes, I'll kill you.

• Samantha Jones : [to Peter]  I heard about you. Big pepper mill dick!

• Charlotte York : I'm confused. Why did he do that? Did he wanna have sex with you?

  Carrie Bradshaw : I don't know. It didn't feel sexual.

  Samantha Jones : Maybe he just wanted to show it off. Like a monkey.

  [Miranda titters] 

  Samantha Jones : So, how big was it?

  Waiter : Fresh pepper?

  [holds pepper mill] 

  Carrie Bradshaw : [as Samantha gives the downward-held pepper mill a very meaningful look]  Yes, please, thank you very much.

  [Miranda smiles as the waiter serves pepper] 

  Carrie Bradshaw : That will do.

  Waiter : [to Samantha, with the mill held, inadvertently, in front of his groin]  Would you like some fresh pepper?

  Samantha Jones : Oh, honey, I'd love some. In fact, I think everyone at this table could use a *lot* of fresh pepper.

  [the women smile] 

  Samantha Jones : Thanks.

  [as waiter walks away:] 

  Samantha Jones : Mm.