Seinfeld (TV Series)

The Understudy (1995)

John O'Hurley: J. Peterman

Quotes 

• J. Peterman : Then, in the distance, I heard the bulls. I began running as fast as I could. Fortunately, I was wearing my Italian cap toe oxfords. Sophisticated yet different; nothing to make a huge fuss about. Rich dark brown calfskin leather. Matching leather vent. Men's whole and half sizes 7 through 13. Price: $135.00.

• Elaine Benes : I'm so sorry. I don't even know where I'm going.

  J. Peterman : That's the best way to get someplace you've never been.

• J. Peterman : That's a nice jacket.

  Elaine Benes : Oh, thanks.

  J. Peterman : Very soft, huge button flaps, cargo pockets, draw string waist, deep bi-swing vents in the back, perfect for jumping into a gondola.

  Elaine Benes : Wow. How do you know all that?

  J. Peterman : That's my coat.

  Elaine Benes : You mean...?

  J. Peterman : Yes, I'm J. Peterman.

• J. Peterman : I like that shirt. Where did you get it?

  Elaine Benes : Oh, this innocent looking shirt has something which isn't innocent at all. Touchability. Heavy, silky Italian cotton, with a fine almost terrycloth-like feeling. Five button placket, relaxed fit. innocence and mayhem at once.

  J. Peterman : That's not bad!