Seinfeld (TV Series)

The Maestro (1995)

Michael Richards: Cosmo Kramer

Photos 

Quotes 

• Cosmo Kramer : Well you know they don't allow outside drinks in the movie theater. So I had to put it in my shirt and sneak it in.

  Jackie Chiles : Yeah, see they like to sell their own coffee.

  Cosmo Kramer : Yeah, now is that going to be a problem?

  Jackie Chiles : Yeah that's going to be a problem. It's gonna be a problem for them. This a clear violation of your rights as a consumer. It's an infringement on your constitutional rights. It's outrageous, egregious, preposterous.

  Cosmo Kramer : It's definitely preposterous.

  Jackie Chiles : So. Then what happened?

  Cosmo Kramer : Well I was trying to get to my seat and I had to step over someone and I kind of got pushed and it spilled on me.

  Jackie Chiles : Was there a top on it?

  Cosmo Kramer : Yeah

  Jackie Chiles : Now did you put the top on or did they put the top on for you?

  Cosmo Kramer : No. They put the top on.

  Jackie Chiles : And they made the top. You didn't make the top did you?

  [Kramer motions that he did not make the top] 

  Jackie Chiles : [to secretary over intercom]  Suzie. I want you to go down to Java World. Get me a cafe latte with a top.

  [to Kramer] 

  Jackie Chiles : We're gonna run some test on that top. Have you been to the doctor?

  Cosmo Kramer : No. No, I haven't.

  Jackie Chiles : Suzie. Call Dr. Bison. Set up an appointment for Mr. Kramer here. Tell him it's from me.

  Cosmo Kramer : So, what do you think, Mr. Chiles.

  Jackie Chiles : Jackie

  Cosmo Kramer : Jackie. I mean, we have a chance?

  Jackie Chiles : Do we have a chance? You get me one coffee drinker on that jury, you gonna walk outta there a rich man.