Scrubs (TV Series)

My Choosiest Choice of All (2004)

Zach Braff: Dr. John 'J.D.' Dorian

Photos 

Quotes 

• J.D. : When it comes down to it, you just have to be proud of the decision you made.

• J.D. : You don't enjoy hanging out with me, do you?

  Danni Sullivan : Not really, I'm more into tough guys, you know?

  J.D. : Last night in bed I knocked you unconscious.

  Danni Sullivan : For like 5 seconds.

• J.D. : How could you do this to me?

  Elliot : Do what?

  J.D. : I don't know, come over to my house, sleep with me and the dump me the minute Sean shows up so I'd feel like a complete loser.

  Elliot : Oh, you seem real crushed, I mean, you jumped into bed with Danny so quick you didn't have time to change the sheets.

  J.D. : You know I only have one set.

• J.D. : [FANTASY: J.D. has a bullhorn and a Viking hat]  Attention, Sacred Heart! Everyone please gather 'round. Doctors, nurses, patients, hear ye, hear ye. Everyone should know that last night, Elliot Reid and I made passionate love for a good hour and a half. Check that - a *great* hour and a half!

• J.D. : [Sean and Elliot are kissing. J.D. watches them miserably, until Sean notices him staring]  You've got something on your face.

  Sean Kelly : [Breaks the kiss and wipes at his face]  What?

  J.D. : [In thought]  The love of my life.

  [Out loud] 

  J.D. : You got it.

• J.D. : Hey, you wanna play darts?

  Danni Sullivan : Sure!

  [She gets up excitedly] 

  J.D. : Great! Have fun, I'll be over here.

  Danni Sullivan : Do you even enjoy spending time with me?

  J.D. : *Enjoy* is such a strong word... I... I'm used to it. You know, like cafeteria food, or the constant threat of terrorism.

• J.D. : So I guess... this is over.

  Danni Sullivan : Why?

  J.D. : So, you'd rather hang out with someone you don't even like than be alone?

  Danni Sullivan : Yeah, pretty much.

  J.D. : [Despondently]  Yeah, me too.

• Dr. John 'J.D.' Dorian : What should I do?

  [Voice over] 

  Dr. John 'J.D.' Dorian : That was a huge mistake. Because the closer Turk and Carla got to their wedding, the more they became one of those annoying couples that thought they knew everything about relationships.

  Dr. Christopher Turk , Nurse Carla Espinosa : Look, J.D... .

  Dr. Christopher Turk : You first, honey.

  Nurse Carla Espinosa : J.D., love is like a butterfly. Hold it too tight and... you'll crush it.

  Dr. Christopher Turk : Too loose and it flies away.

• Dr. Christopher Turk : [J.D. is staring motionless at the door]  Morning.

  Nurse Carla Espinosa : [to Turk, about J.D]  What's up with him?

  Dr. Christopher Turk : He slept with Elliot last night.

  Nurse Carla Espinosa : Is it THAT time of year again?

  Dr. Christopher Turk : [to J.D]  Dude, ignore her. That's three years in a row -- who's feeling you?

  Dr. John 'J.D.' Dorian : You be.

• Dr. Elliot Reid : Look, you and I have been down this road before and we both know where it ends. I'm sorry. I just... I really want to make this work with Sean. So, please don't say anything to him? Okay?

  Dr. John 'J.D.' Dorian : I totally understand. You know, Danni and I are getting back together, too.

  [Voice over] 

  Dr. John 'J.D.' Dorian : We are?

• Nurse Carla Espinosa : Bambi, when you broke up with Danni, you said it was the happiest day of your life!

  Dr. John 'J.D.' Dorian : No, that was only because "Barney Miller" came out on DVD.

  Dr. Christopher Turk : And Wojo's commentary on it? Priceless!

• Irv : I've been trying like the dickens to cut down on my snacking, but it's just so...

  Dr. John 'J.D.' Dorian : Ehp-ehp-ehp! You look great, Irv!

  [Voice over] 

  Dr. John 'J.D.' Dorian : Irv didn't look great, but I didn't have time to talk.

• Dr. John 'J.D.' Dorian : [J.D. is lying in bed, staring at the ceiling] 

  [Voice over] 

  Dr. John 'J.D.' Dorian : Okay, Elliot really hurt me. Still, right now I need to keep a level head. My emotions are all over the place, and it's important that I don't do anything rash.

  [the camera pulls back to reveal Danni lying next to him, smoking a cigarette with a huge ashtray full of butts] 

  Dr. John 'J.D.' Dorian : [coughing]  Do you have to do that here?

  Danni : What? I like smoking after sex.

  Dr. John 'J.D.' Dorian : And during.

• Dr. John 'J.D.' Dorian : God, you never used to smoke.

  Danni : Yeah, but back then I was pretending to be someone I thought you wanted me to be, and that didn't work. So now... .

  [sitting up] 

  Danni : I'm gonna let the real me come out. And the real me wants to do it again... and she wants to do it rough!

  Dr. John 'J.D.' Dorian : Oh, I don't know, Danni. The real me's not really into that.

  Danni : GIVE IT TO ME!

  Dr. John 'J.D.' Dorian : [He yells and slaps her across the face, knocking her to the bed] 

  [Concerned] 

  Dr. John 'J.D.' Dorian : Oh, my God, Danni, I am so sorry. I thought that's what you wanted.

  Danni : [Grinning]  It was.

  Dr. John 'J.D.' Dorian : [She reaches up and twists his nipples, pulling him down to her]  YAAHHHH!

• Dr. John 'J.D.' Dorian : [Voice over]  I was so mad at Elliot I couldn't sleep last night. Also, Danni snores like a gutted wild boar. But mostly it was the Elliot thing.