Scrubs (TV Series)

My Advice to You (2003)

Donald Faison: Dr. Christopher Turk

Quotes 

• Nurse Carla Espinosa : Why is there a pancake in the silverware drawer?

  Dr. Christopher Turk : You mean, why is there silverware in the *pancake drawer*? Wuhuh!

• [Carla's visiting brother pretends that he only speaks & understands Spanish, when he does understand English as well. Turk knows this and has been trying to trick Marko into speaking English in front of her] 

  Mark : [Turk enters his apartment, when Carla and Marco have already been there a while]  Hey, jackass.

  Dr. Christopher Turk : Hello, Mark. I'm guessing Carla's not around.

  Mark : She's in the bathroom.

  [Carla enters living room from bathroom, and Marco switches to Spanish] 

  Mark : cepillando sus dientes.

  [translation: brushing her teeth] 

  Dr. Christopher Turk : [to Carla, flirtingly]  Hey baby! Give me some of that minty breath.

  Nurse Carla Espinosa : No, not in front of my brother. That stuff always makes him uncomfortable.

  Dr. Christopher Turk : Oh, really? I just wanted to apologize the way I've been acting by loving you...

  [sing-song and making lewd gestures] 

  Dr. Christopher Turk : up and down and all around...

  [Marco begins to make a move against Turk, but Carla happens to turn around and he retreats] 

  Nurse Carla Espinosa : Turk!

  Dr. Christopher Turk : Baby, he can't understand you. Now, let's go put some more of your footprints on the ceiling.

  Mark : THAT'S IT, YOU SON OF A BITCH!

  Dr. Christopher Turk : [to Carla]  I told you.

  [Marco punches Turk in the face, knocking him out] 

• Nurse Carla Espinosa : Now, I want you to try and get along with him this time? If you do, I promise to fulfill that fantasy of yours -- but not with the weird outfit, and none of those crazy toys.

  Dr. Christopher Turk : So we'd just have normal sex.

  Nurse Carla Espinosa : If I'm not sleepy.

  Dr. Christopher Turk : Deal.