The Office (TV Series)

The Quiz (2001)

Ricky Gervais: David Brent

Photos 

Quotes 

• [Arguing over the quiz result and request for a rematch] 

  Chris Finch : Right, I will throw anything you choose over this building. If I do it, we win the quiz. Right?

  David Brent : Yeah, so you choose anything. If he can throw it over, we've won the champagne. And that's it. And that's the real quiz. Choose one thing.

  Ricky : You really are a couple of sad little men, aren't you?

  Gareth : Oh yeah, they're sad little men. He's thrown a kettle over a pub. What have you ever done?

• Tim : I live with my parents

  David Brent : Cherish them. Both of mine are dead. Well, my dad's not dead, but in a home, so good as.

• David Brent : People go, "Why is it important, a question about Mr. Spock?" Oh, I go, "It's like saying I've got a new pedigree dog breed. It's half Alsatian, half Labrador". I go on to Crufts, I go, "Can I enter this dog in the Labrador section?" "No." "Why?" "Because it's not a Labrador." "Correct." "Can I enter it in the Alsatian section?" "No. For the same reasons. Now get that dog out of my sight." "Thanks, I will. You've proved my point." And that's Crufts. All right.

• David Brent : If someone's, ehm, unlucky you go: I'm not saying he's unlucky, but if he fell into a barrel of tits, he'd come up sucking his own thumb.

  [giggles] 

  David Brent : Bit naughty, huh?

  Gareth : Suck tits? I thought you sucked knobbs.

  David Brent : Do ya?

  [more high-pitched giggles] 

• [David, Gareth and Tim are discussing catchphrases] 

  Gareth : What ones are yours that I use?

  David Brent : Same shit, different day, that's mine. Exsqueeze me, instead of excuse me.

  Tim : Wank you very much.

  David Brent : Yeah, I invented that.