The Muppet Show (TV Series)

Kris Kristofferson and Rita Coolidge (1978)

Jim Henson: Kermit the Frog, Rowlf, Dr. Teeth, Muppet Newsman, Waldorf

Quotes 

• Rowlf : Okay, what happens now?

  Fozzie : Oh, now comes the funny part.

  [exits] 

  Rowlf : Well, leaving the stage is funnier than a lot of things the bear does.

  Fozzie : [enters holding a fish]  Okay, now ask me what I'm carrying the fish for.

  Rowlf : Oh, Fozzie, what are you carrying the fish for?

  Fozzie : Oh, just for the halibut.

  Rowlf : You were better off leaving the stage.

• Statler : You know, they can improve the whole show if they just change the ending.

  Waldorf : How?

  Statler : Put it closer to the beginning.

  [they both laugh] 

• The Newsman : And now a Muppet News Flash. This is an update on the Henderson burglary. Police have recovered all the stolen property except the silverware. It has disappeared into thin air.

  [suddenly, a bunch of silverware rains down on the desk]