Monk (TV Series)

Mr. Monk and the Sleeping Suspect (2003)

Tony Shalhoub: Adrian Monk

Photos 

Quotes 

• Captain Leland Stottlemeyer : Monk, I have known fifteen thousand criminals in my lifetime. Here's what they all have in common: THEY'RE CONSCIOUS!

  Adrian Monk : Nonetheless.

  Captain Leland Stottlemeyer : Is your shrink coming back soon?

• Captain Leland Stottlemeyer : Monk, give me something else, any theory at all besides the coma guy. If-if you were to tell me that Howdy Doody was behind this, it would make more sense.

  Adrian Monk : [yelling]  Howdy Doody? Why would Howdy Doody be sending people mail bombs? Wasn't he a puppet?

• Adrian Monk : [Dr Kroger is going on vacation for 3 weeks]  Why didn't you tell me?

  Dr. Charles Kroger : I did. I told you every week for the past month, but I guess you just, um, blocked it out.

  Adrian Monk : Is that possible?

  Dr. Charles Kroger : Apparently.

  Adrian Monk : I guess I did... I blocked it out. No problem, we'll talk about it on Thursday.

• [Monk and Sharona narrowly survived a bomb blast] 

  Captain Leland Stottlemeyer : Okay, they pieced together enough of the package to get a postmark. It was mailed from Pacific Heights three days ago.

  Lt. Randall Disher : Different post office, same type of explosive.

  Adrian Monk : [yelling]  Well, don't use that bathroom, it's a mess!

  Sharona Fleming : You don't have to shout!

  Adrian Monk : [still yelling]  Why are you whispering?

• Agent Grooms : Captain? D.A. won't hold Ricky Babbage, I was hoping this might change your mind?

  [no answer] 

  Agent Grooms : Oh, you can't be serious. You still think Rip van Winkle's behind this?

  Captain Leland Stottlemeyer : We believe Brian Babbage is involved, yes. We just don't know how.

  Agent Grooms : And by "we", you mean you and your "consultant"?

  [They both look at Monk] 

  Adrian Monk : [yelling, due to lingering auditory effects of the bomb blast]  Yeah, I'm pretty sure Howdy Doody was a puppet!

  Agent Grooms : How was your career, Captain? Did you enjoy it?

• [to use a vacuum cleaner, Monk mistakenly unplugs Brian's respirator. When the alarms go off, Monk hurriedly plugs it back in] 

  Adrian Monk : Okay, Brian, come back... Brian? Come back!

  [starts applying CPR] 

  Adrian Monk : Okay, come on, you and me... you and me... you and me, all the way.

  [Nurse Stempel comes in and sees Monk on top of Brian Babbage, the second time in as many days that she has witnessed Monk in a seemingly compromising position with the comatose man, following a previous Monk-like misadventure] 

  Adrian Monk : Almost... almost... almost!

  [the alarms stop] 

  Adrian Monk : That's got it! That's got it...

  [turns and sees her] 

  Adrian Monk : He's... he's good. I mean... he's great. I mean... he's, he's fine now.

• Adrian Monk : Brian Babbage wanted to kill his brother and sister. He found a way to mail a bomb in May, but not have it be delivered until August. It was quite brilliant, really...

  Camole Swarma, Mailman : Yes, it was. Although by doing so, he violated two federal laws and a score of postal regulations.

  [off Monk's look] 

  Camole Swarma, Mailman : Go on.

• [Sharona is holding a time bomb] 

  Sharona Fleming : What is that?

  Adrian Monk : Light turned green.

  Ricky Babbage : [on the phone with the bomb squad]  Light turned green... he says you have ten seconds, cut one of the wires!

  Adrian Monk : Which one?

  Ricky Babbage : Either one, it doesn't matter!

  Sharona Fleming : Oh, God...

  Adrian Monk : Blue... no, no, red...

  Sharona Fleming : Cut one, cut the blue one!

  Ricky Babbage : Five seconds!

  Adrian Monk : Why blue?

  Sharona Fleming : Oh, well cut the red one!

  Adrian Monk : You said blue!

  Ricky Babbage : Three seconds!

  Sharona Fleming : [screaming]  ADRIAN, CUT ONE!

  Adrian Monk : I'LL CUT 'EM BOTH!

  [does] 

• Captain Leland Stottlemeyer : In twenty seconds, Agent Grooms is gonna come walking through that door, and he's gonna ask me what I think. Give me something else, for the love of God!

  Lt. Randall Disher : Okay, wait. I have an idea. Maybe he had an accomplice.

  Captain Leland Stottlemeyer : Yes. Somebody else mailed the damn thing. Why not?

  Sharona Fleming : I already had that idea.

  [to Monk] 

  Sharona Fleming : Tell him.

  Adrian Monk : There was no accomplice. Why would Brian Babbage hire one? He didn't know he was gonna be in a coma.

  Sharona Fleming : It's not exactly something you can plan.

  Adrian Monk : Right. Anyway, why would an accomplice bother to go through with it? There was no reason to. The guy who hired him was in a coma.

  Captain Leland Stottlemeyer : All right, so, Brian built the bomb... and then, Brian mailed the bomb... by himself.

  Adrian Monk : That's right.

  Captain Leland Stottlemeyer : ...While he was in a coma.

  Adrian Monk : You gotta admit, it's a pretty good alibi. It's rock-solid.