Married... with Children (TV Series)

Requiem for a Dead Briard (1995)

Ed O'Neill: Al Bundy

Quotes 

• Kelly Bundy : Let's call him Lucky. Lucky Bundy.

  Al Bundy : I was saving that name for my tombstone.

• Peggy Bundy : And to think I could have had any man on the football team...

  Al Bundy : Peg, you had them all!

• Al Bundy : Well, uh... I've got some good news and I've got some bad news. The good news is Tweety knew over 150 words.

  Bud Bundy : Well, what's the, um, what's the bad news, Dad?

  Al Bundy : Bad news is that none of them were "Please don't eat me."

• [Al rushes upstairs to find out what happened to their new pet cockatoo, Tweety] 

  Al Bundy : [to Peg's mom]  What do you mean you thought it was a chicken? When was the last time you heard a chicken doing a Marlon Brando impression?

• Kelly Bundy : He's not Buck. Can he roll over and play dead?

  Marcy D'Arcy : Buck couldn't do that.

  Al Bundy : Till now.

• Al Bundy : I can't afford a pet since Peg's mom, aka Free Willy, beached herself upstairs.

  Peg's Mom : I am not beached! I can roll over if I want to.