Married... with Children (TV Series)

Married... with Prom Queen: The Sequel (1989)

Ed O'Neill: Al Bundy

Photos 

Quotes 

• Peggy Bundy : Al, let's go home.

  Al Bundy : Peg, home is where the horror is. Now, I'm talking to Hooter.

  Vicky : Vicky.

  Al Bundy : Uh, Vi-Vicky here.

• Peggy Bundy : Honey, you know what would top this night off just perfectly?

  Al Bundy : Oh no.

  Peggy Bundy : Aw come on, you can't tell me you don't want to. What's that in your pocket?

  Al Bundy : My rib.

• Speedy : Ah, you look like you could still play football, Al, huh? How do you stay in shape?

  Al Bundy : Running from Peg on sex nights.

• Al Bundy : You know, Peg, I'm having the time of my life. Being married to you, I forgot how great I was. Why oh why did I leave high school?

  Peggy Bundy : You were 30, Al.

• Eli : You know, you marrying Peg was the only bet I ever lost.

  Al Bundy : Me too.

• Al Bundy : So, what are you doing these days, Eli?

  Eli : I'm a psychiatrist. What do you do?

  Al Bundy : A... A garbage salesman.

• Jimbo : Hey, Al. Al, you want to see something funny? You remember the nerds, Tyrone and Milton? The guy who used to eat his pen? Ha ha ha. Look at him over there with the other nerds, still sitting together.

  [Al and his friends look over and see the former nerds in fancy suits and with beautiful women] 

  Milton : [waves to Al's group]  You should have done your own homework, guys!

  Al Bundy : Ah, eat your pen, Milton.

• Peggy Bundy : Now, I'm gonna go try to get some more votes for queen. You guys just sit back and reminisce about being human.

  [to Al] 

  Peggy Bundy : Oh, and don't you do anything stupid.

  [walks past Eli] 

  Peggy Bundy : Ugh!

  Eli : Don't worry, beautiful. I'll keep an eye on him.

  [Peg leaves] 

  Eli : Say, Al. I just happen to have this nail here. Ten bucks says Bundy can drive it through this table with his head.

  Al Bundy : Aw, come on, guys. I don't do that kind of thing anymore. I'm an adult now.

  Eli : Oh, hey, what happened? Your head ain't as hard as it used to be? Huh, Al? Huh?

  Al Bundy : Place your bets.

• Peggy Bundy : Oh, Al. It's no use. I've worked the room for over an hour and I've lost three votes. Connie's gonna be reunion queen. By the way, honey, how'd you hurt your forehead?

  Al Bundy : [wearing a bandage on his head]  Um... shaving.

• Sable : Oh, Mr. Bundy, you are so magnificent.

  [Al grunts while staring at her chest] 

  Sable : Did you really give up a chance to play for the Bears for your wife?

  Al Bundy : Well, yeah, I figured if I'm gonna take a kick to the groin, might as well be for love.

• Jack : Hey, Al, I've done a lot of thinking about this rivalry that we have and I think the whole thing is silly. Truth is, I can't think of a damn thing you can do better than me.

  Al Bundy : Well, why don't you ask your wife about that, Jack?

• Al Bundy : Well, you know, Peg, it's, uh, it's like I told you on our wedding night when you woke me up: You sure know how to ruin a good time.