Married... with Children (TV Series)

Kelly Doesn't Live Here Anymore (1992)

Christina Applegate: Kelly Bundy

Photos 

Quotes 

• Miss Parker : Now that you're a "waitress", stay away from my new husband. He's only 18 and still peaking.

  Kelly Bundy : Well, he'd have to peak. He wouldn't want to look at you dead on.

• Wayne : I just want to let you know, that you are the stupidest girl I've had working here. And that says a lot. That says an awful lot. In fact, you are one whopping moron. So... you want to go out with me later?

  Kelly Bundy : I'd rather stick my face in the deep fryer, that is if there's enough room for it with the rats in there.

  Wayne : Hey, it took me half-an-hour to clean most of them out of there. Besides, the people seem to like the tails. We call them cajun fries. Oh, would you set a couple of traps before you leave? And set them on stun for they stay fresher.

• Kelly Bundy : So, is there any training that I have to do?

  Wayne : Let's see, er, do you know what a plate looks like?

  [Kelly points to it] 

  Wayne : Excellent. You know what a table looks like?

  [Kelly points to it] 

  Wayne : Excellent. Now, you take one to the other. You know which one?

  Kelly Bundy : Well, the table would be too heavy to take to the plate. Ergo, as Shakespeare said, the plate's the thing.

  Wayne : You are a find!