M*A*S*H (TV Series)

Yankee Doodle Doctor (1972)

Wayne Rogers: Capt. 'Trapper John' McIntyre

Photos 

Quotes 

• Frank Burns : [practicing reciting for upcoming film]  "A group of brave men are at work in a make shift operating room struggling to save your sons and brothers while outside the dogs of war bark at the door of this sanctuary."

  Trapper : [Hawkeye barks like a dog]  Down, boy, down, down! Roll over. Jump through that.

  Frank Burns : "These are the saints in surgical garb, dedicated surgeons, all volunteers. Every red-blooded American knows, if he is wounded, he will be in the strong, capable hands of a Yankee Doodle Doctor."

  Hawkeye , Trapper : A Yankee Doodle Doctor? Stuck a feather in his nurse and called her macaroni.

  Frank Burns : You didn't like it?

  Hawkeye : Didn't like it? Let me count the ways.

  Margaret : That's hardly a constructive criticism.

  Hawkeye : Oh, you want a *constructive* criticism. You're right. How about, you stink! And so does this little movie show and Lieutenant Bricker.

  Frank Burns : Stinks? Oh, you, you...

  Hawkeye : Who you calling a you-you?

• Trapper : [repeating some of Clayton's dialogue]  'Every doctor here is a volunteer'?

  Hawkeye : When they came for me, I was hiding under the front porch trying to puncture my eardrum.

• Trapper : [after destroying all of Lt. Bricker's film]  Is that it?

  Hawkeye : Th-th-th-th-th-th-that's all, folks!

• Lt. Col. Henry Blake : Okay, why'd you do it?

  Trapper : Do what?

  Lt. Col. Henry Blake : Do what you did.

  Hawkeye : What are we supposed to have done that makes you ask if we've done what we did?