Photos
Quotes
-
Hawkeye : Let me tell you something, Charles. You think women are only good for one thing.
Maj. Charles Winchester : Oh, don't be absurd, Pierce. I respect and I admire the sex.
Hawkeye : Sure! As long as they're your handmaidens. As long as they tell you what a great guy you are and carry out your every whim. You know something, Charles? Sitting here listening to you spout your bilge, I get a picture clear and sharp of the world's most perfect ass.
Maj. Charles Winchester : Are you referring to me?
Hawkeye : I'm referring to me!
Maj. Charles Winchester : Well, that's better.
Capt. B.J. Hunnicutt : Oh, don't feel bad, Charles. You're just as perfect.
-
Maj. Charles Winchester : Face it, Pierce. She was far more attracted to me, until you began assassinating my character.
Capt. B.J. Hunnicutt : You assassinated his character?
Hawkeye : Yeah. I let him talk.
-
Hawkeye : I haven't treated you like a professional?
Maj. Margaret "Hot Lips" Houlihan : All you think about with women is one thing.
Hawkeye : In some cases, not even one.
Capt. B.J. Hunnicutt : Hard smash to your left, Margaret.
Maj. Margaret "Hot Lips" Houlihan : That's supposed to cut me to the quick, right? You've got a yardstick that's three letters high: S-E-X. And you measure every woman in the camp by it.
Capt. B.J. Hunnicutt : Great backhand.
Hawkeye : What are you getting so excited about?
Maj. Margaret "Hot Lips" Houlihan : I'm sick and tired of the way you chase the nurses! Now that you've met a woman who's on your own professional level, I'm loving every minute of it.
Maj. Charles Winchester : As am I.
-
Maj. Margaret "Hot Lips" Houlihan : So that's all that bothered you, huh? The way she did it.
Hawkeye : Yeah.
Maj. Margaret "Hot Lips" Houlihan : I've got a big piece of news for you, Captain. Charles is right. The fact that she's a woman is what gets you.
Hawkeye : You must be kidding.
Maj. Margaret "Hot Lips" Houlihan : Oh, you love the women. As long as they're cute and charming and following orders, you're happy as a clam. You're fine with the handmaidens, but let a woman be an equal really makes your hair fall out, doesn't it?
Maj. Charles Winchester : Margaret, could you find a better simile?
