Friends (TV Series)
The One with the Two Parties (1996)
Courteney Cox: Monica Geller
Photos
Quotes
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Monica Geller : [Joey is staring at Monica's breasts] Joey, they're not real!
[Joey pays attention]
Monica Geller : I start miles beneath the surface of these things, ok? They're fake. See?
[Monica squeezes one of her breasts]
Monica Geller : Honk, honk!
Chandler Bing : [pause] Wow, it's like porno for clowns!
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Phoebe Buffay : I have the birthday candles. Where's the birthday cake?
Monica Geller : We're not having cake. We're having flan.
Chandler Bing : Excuse me?
Monica Geller : It's a festive custard Mexican dessert.
Joey Tribbiani : Great idea. "Happy birthday, Rachel! Here's some goo!"
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[Gunther tries to leave Monica's party]
Monica Geller : [calls] Gunther! Where are you going?
Gunther : I um... was sort of thinking about maybe...
Monica Geller : [insisting] No! No you can't go!
[Monica goes up to Gunther and pulls him away from the door]
Monica Geller : [insisting] No! This is fun! Come on! We're just getting started! Here! Here's your marker!
[Monica gives Gunther a marker and walks away as Phoebe comes over]
Phoebe Buffay : [gently assuring] If you wanna go, just go.
Gunther : No. She'll yell at me again.
Phoebe Buffay : Alright. I can get you out.
Gunther : What?
Phoebe Buffay : Shhh. In a minute, I'm gonna create a diversion. When I do, walk quickly to the door and don't look back.
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Monica Geller : OK. The first person's most embarrassing memory is...
[Monica takes a piece of paper out of a hat]
Monica Geller : [reading] "Monica your party sucks."
[Monica forces a laugh]
Monica Geller : [sarcastically] Very funny.
[Monica is about to take out another piece of paper when Phoebe turns to the table near the window]
Phoebe Buffay : [pretending to act concerned] Oh no! Ooh! Did someone forget to use a coaster?
Monica Geller : [shocked] WHAT?
[Monica goes over to the table and Phoebe gestures to Gunther who nods and quickly leaves the apartment]
Monica Geller : [looks at the table and then at Phoebe] I don't see anything.
Phoebe Buffay : [sarcastically] Great. I'm seeing water rings again.
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[Monica is hosting her party, but the guests are clearly not enjoying themselves]
Monica Geller : I do ask that when you're not using the markers, you put the caps back *on* them... because they will dry out.
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[at Joey and Chandler's party, loud music is playing, the guests are dancing and there's an open pizza box with a partly eaten pizza on a table]
Monica Geller : [holding a black bin bag] Could you guys please try to keep it down? We're trying to start a Bovril Tournament!
[Joey and Chandler look at each other and burst out laughing and Monica recognizes some of the dancing guests]
Monica Geller : [shocked] You! And *you*! You're supposed to be at *my* party!
[the dancing guests look uneasy but continue dancing and Gunther appears]
Monica Geller : [very shocked] And *Gunther*!
[Gunther looks down and Monica is in sheer disbelief]
Monica Geller : [incredulous] *What* are you doing here?
Gunther : [trying to sound positive] Um...
[Gunther indicates the other dancing guests and continues dancing as Phoebe arrives with three guests from Monica's party]
Phoebe Buffay : [opens the door] OK! Welcome to the fo...
[Phoebe sees Monica and stops]
Monica Geller : [disbelief] Phoebe...?
Phoebe Buffay : [making her point] Alright! I'm sorry! But these people *needed* me! You know they work hard all week! It's Saturday night! They deserve to have a little fun! Go!
[the guests join the dancers]
Monica Geller : [making her point] *My* party is fun! Well maybe it's a little quieter, less *obvious* sort of fun, but you know if people would just give a chance it's a w...
[a volleyball hits Monica on the back of her head and she turns around looking very stern]