Friends (TV Series)

The One with All the Poker (1995)

David Schwimmer: Dr. Ross Geller

Photos 

Quotes 

• Monica : *Okay.* Are we ready to play some serious poker?

  Ross : Well, are you sure? Phoebe just threw away two jacks because they didn't look happy.

• [Ross coming back from bathroom, getting ready to play poker with Rachel] 

  Ross : Your money's mine, Green.

  Rachel : Your fly's open, Geller.

• Ross : Look, Rachel. I play to win, and in order for me to win, other people have to lose. So if you're going to play with me, don't expect me to be a nice guy, 'cause when I play poker...

  [wipes his hands] 

  Joey : Yeah?

  Ross : I'm not a nice guy.

• Chandler : You know, I can't believe you. Linda is so great! Why won't you go out with her again?

  Ross : I don't know.

  Chandler : Is this still about her whole 'The Flintstones could've really happened' thing?

  Ross : No, it's not just that. It's just--I want someone who... who does something for me, y'know? Who gets my heart pounding, who... who makes me, uh...

  [begins to stare lovingly at Rachel] 

  Chandler : ...little playthings with yarn?

  Ross : What?

  Chandler : Could you want her more?

  Ross : Who?

  Chandler : [sarcastically]  Dee, the sarcastic sister from What's Happening!

• Ross : [looking at Rachel's resume]  Rach, did you proof read these?

  Rachel : Uh, yeah. Why?

  Ross : Uh, nothing. I'm sure they'll be impressed with your excellent "compuper skills".

  Rachel : Oh my God! Oh, do you think it's on all of them?

  Joey : Ah, no, I'm sure the Xerox machine caught a few.

• Chandler : There just don't happen to be any women in our game.

  Joey : Yeah, we just don't happen to know any women that know how to play poker.

  Monica : Oh, please, that is such a lame excuse! That's a typical guy response.

  Ross : Excuse me, do any of you know how to play?

  Monica , Rachel , Phoebe : No...

  Rachel : But you could teach us!

  Ross , Chandler , Joey : No...

• Ross : [Playing Pictionary, Rachel draws a bean]  bean... bean

  Joey : The Unbearable Lightness of Being!

  Rachel : Yes!

• Ross : I'm not in love with her.

  Chandler : Then what was with that whole Black Bart speech? "When I play poker, I'm not a nice guy."

• Joey : [about a poker hand]  There was chocolate on the 3. It looked like an 8. All right?

  Ross : You should've seen him. "Read 'em and weep".

  Chandler : And then he did.

• Monica : That You Get. THAT YOU GET

  Rachel : No

  Phoebe : No

  Ross : No

  Joey : No

  Chandler : No