- Vivian Banks: Philip, if you died tomorrow, what would you want me to do?
- Philip Banks: Jump in with me and bring the kids.
- Vivian Banks: Oh, you don't really mean that.
- Philip Banks: You're right. Leave the kids.
- Philip Banks: [when Will and Carlton are making a dress] Son...
- [sees Carlton wearing a dress]
- Philip Banks: and I use that term loosely. What's going on?
- Carlton Banks: Dad, it's not what it looks like. Will and I are making a dress.
- Carlton Banks: That's exactly what it looks like.
- William 'Will' Smith: Carlton, this is the saddest sight I've ever seen. Other than your girlfriend in biker shorts.
- Carlton Banks: When did you see my girlfriend in biker shorts?
- Geoffrey: Last Thursday at the tennis courts. Magnificent server.
- Vivian Banks: [Leading out seductively from behind the closet door] I'm going to slip into something that's going to knock your socks off.
- Philip Banks: My socks are already off. Just step out naked.
- Vivian Banks: So, Ed, uh, Hattie tells us that you grew up on a farm.
- Ed Downer: That's right, a horse farm.
- Philip Banks: Hmm, my daddy had a horse.
- Carlton Banks: Um, uh, Mr. Downer, what breed did you raise?
- Ed Downer: Appaloosas. They have the most beautiful spotted coats.
- Philip Banks: My dad had a spotted coat, then he had it cleaned.
- Ashley Banks: Did you have any other animals on your farm?
- Ed Downer: Oh, of course. We had chickens, cows, and a great old dog named Brownie.
- Philip Banks: My dad loved brownies. He once ate a whole pan full.
- William 'Will' Smith: [to Carlton] That explains a lot.
- Hilary Banks: So what happened to your farm?
- Ed Downer: My son's there. I passed it on to him, like my dad got it from his parents.
- Philip Banks: My dad had parents. We called them Grandmom and Grandpop.
- Hattie Banks: Uh, Zeke, honey, it smells like my dessert is ready. Would you go check on it for me, please?
- Ed Downer: Mmm. Smells like sweet potato pie.
- Philip Banks: My dad liked...
- Vivian Banks, Carlton Banks, Ashley Banks, William 'Will' Smith, Hilary Banks: SWEET POTATO PIE!