Frasier (TV Series)

Secret Admirer (1998)

Kelsey Grammer: Dr. Frasier Crane

Photos 

Quotes 

• Martin : Hey guys.

  Niles : Hey there.

  Daphne Moon : So, who won the squash game?

  Dr. Frasier Crane : Oh Daphne, it's not about winning or losing, its about the thrill of competition.

  Martin : Congratulations Niles.

• Roz Doyle : Hey, Frasier! Nancy, hi!

  Nancy : Hi!

  Roz Doyle : So, are you back to work yet?

  Nancy : Almost, I start at KNFS tomorrow.

  Dr. Frasier Crane : You know, Roz, Nancy and I are having coffee.

  Roz Doyle : Oh, none for me, thanks.

  [to waitress] 

  Roz Doyle : Listen, can I have a fat-free muffin, please? Nancy, I have been dying to call you. My cousin just moved to town and I think he'd be perfect for you!

  Nancy : Actually, I just started seeing someone.

  Roz Doyle : Well, you'll forget all about him when you meet Chuck. He is so handsome and rugged and he loves the outdoors...

  Dr. Frasier Crane : Kindly leave him there. You see, the person that Nancy is seeing is me.

  Roz Doyle : Really? You two are dating?

  Dr. Frasier Crane : Even as we speak!

  Roz Doyle : Oh, my God! I am so sorry. Well, good for you! I mean, who needs Chuck when you've got... well, the anti-Chuck?

  [she gets up] 

  Roz Doyle : When my muffin gets here, could you send it over?

  Dr. Frasier Crane : You won't even see it coming.

• Nancy : So, are we still on for Friday night?

  Dr. Frasier Crane : Yes, of course we are. You know, I was wondering... maybe we could just, uh...

  Nancy : Have dinner at your place?

  Dr. Frasier Crane : Yes, that's amazing. You read my mind again.

  Nancy : Well, I just thought it would be more comfortable. We could curl up on the couch, make a nice fire...

  Dr. Frasier Crane : Can you guess what I'm thinking now?

  [she looks at him, then gasps and playfully slaps his face] 

  Dr. Frasier Crane : Oh, you ARE good, aren't you?

• [Niles opens a box and pulls shredded paper aside. There is a small ring box which he opens. The only thing inside is a coin. He picks up the card and reads...] 

  Niles : Roses are red, your heart is fickle. When I'm through with you... all you'll have left is this nickel.

  Martin : Oh, no.

  Niles : Oh, God... she's going to ruin me.

  Dr. Frasier Crane : No, no, Niles, maybe she's bluffing. You know, once she's signed the financial settlement...

  Niles : [picking up the paper]  She's not bluffing. This IS the financial settlement.

• Dr. Frasier Crane : How did things go with Maris?

  Niles : I wish I knew. I returned the gifts and told her there was no chance of reconciliation. She didn't get mad. In fact, she was eerily calm. She just stood there with a blank stare on her face, rubbing her ocelot.

  Martin : You know, they got a cream for that.

• Dr. Frasier Crane : Well, where were we?

  Nancy : Well, I think you were about to ask me out again.

  Dr. Frasier Crane : My gosh, so I was. Well, let's just see how far this ESP of yours goes: what night was I thinking of?

  Nancy : Friday night.

  Dr. Frasier Crane : Astonishing! Busboy, clear these spoons before she starts bending them.

• Dr. Frasier Crane : Ah, yes, there's a group of people that might regret leaving Club Frasier before last call.

• Dr. Frasier Crane : Niles, please, I have had enough of your finger wagging. I am doing what any red-blooded American man would do. For God's sake, there's nothing wrong with playing the field.

  Niles : It looks like you've been eating the field. What did you have for lunch?

  Dr. Frasier Crane : Pesto. Oh, my God! I better go freshen up.

• Roz Doyle : Oh, my God. You have two women?

  Dr. Frasier Crane : At least.

  Roz Doyle : And you're juggling them? And you're getting jewelry?

  Dr. Frasier Crane : Why is that so hard to believe?

  Roz Doyle : Well, I guess since they cloned that sheep, anything's possible.

• Niles : Oh, Frasier, why did I go over there? Why didn't I listen to you?

  Dr. Frasier Crane : Why didn't I listen to you? If I had I'd be sitting with Nancy right now, sipping wine in front of the fire.

  Niles : I'll be stripped clean and devoured like an animal!

  Dr. Frasier Crane : And I WON'T be!

• Nancy : Don't ever call me again.

  Madeline : Or me, you freak!

  Dr. Frasier Crane : Nancy, Madeline, please give me a second chance... either one of you!