Photos
Quotes
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Simon : I'm trying to put this as delicately as I can... How do I know you won't kill me in my sleep?
Mal : You don't know me, son, so let me explain this to you once: If I ever kill you, you'll be awake. You'll be facing me, and you'll be armed.
Simon : Are you always this sentimental?
Mal : I had a good day.
Simon : You had the Alliance on you, criminals and savages... Half the people on the ship have been shot or wounded including yourself, and you're harboring known fugitives.
Mal : Well, we're still flying.
Simon : That's not much.
Mal : It's enough.
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Jayne : [to Simon] Little Kaylee here just wishes you was a gynecologist.
[Jayne laughs]
Mal : Jayne, you will keep a civil tongue in that mouth, or I will sew it shut. Is there an understanding between us?
Jayne : You don't pay me to talk pretty. Just because Kaylee gets lubed up over some big-city dandy doesn't mean...
Mal : Walk away from this table. Right now.
[Jayne loads his plate with food and leaves]
Simon : What *do* you pay him for?
Mal : What?
Simon : I was just wondering what his job is - on the ship.
Mal : Public relations.
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Kaylee : We're taking on passengers at Persephone?
Mal : Yeah, that's the notion. Could use a little respectability on the way to Boros. Not to mention the money.
Jayne : Pain in the ass.
Kaylee : No, it's shiny! I like to meet new people, they've all got stories...
Jayne : Captain, can you stop her from bein' cheerful, please?
Mal : I don't believe there's a power in the 'verse can stop Kaylee from bein' cheerful. Sometimes you just wanna duct-tape her mouth and dump her in the hold for a month.
Kaylee : [kisses Mal's cheek] I love my captain.
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Patience : [points a shotgun at Mal] Mal, don't you take another step!
Mal : [shoots the horse Patience is hiding behind, which traps her; points his gun square in the center of her face] Now I did a job; and got nothing but trouble since I did it, not to mention more than a few unkind words as regard to my character. So let me make this abundantly clear. I do the job...
[Mal takes the money from Patience]
Mal : and then I get paid. Go run your little world.
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Mal : I believe that woman's plannin' to shoot me again.
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Kaylee : [sounding weak, but cheery] Oh, don't you worry none. Doc fixed me up... pretty. He's nice.
Mal : Don't go working too hard on that crush, mei-mei. Doc won't be with us for long.
Kaylee : [big smile] You're nice, too.
Mal : [smiles] No, I'm not. I'm a mean old man.
Kaylee : He wasn't gonna let me die... He was just trying to... It's nobody's fault.
[trying to pat his arm, which Mal then reaches for]
Kaylee : Okay. Just promise me you're gonna remember that.
Mal : [holding her hand with both of his] I'll keep it in mind.
Kaylee : You *are* a nice man, Captain. You're always looking after us. You just gotta have faith in people.
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Mal : [under cross-fire] Bendis, look at me! Listen. We're holding this valley, no matter what.
Bendis : We're gonna die.
Mal : We're not gonna die. We can't die, Bendis. And you know why? Because we are so... very... pretty. We are just too pretty for God to let us die. Huh? Look at that chiseled jaw, huh? Come on!
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Jayne Cobb : Ten percent of nothing is, let me do the math here, nothing into nothing, carry the nothin'...
Mal : Mal: Jayne, your mouth is talking. You might wanna look to that.
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Simon : What business is that exactly?
[pause; Mal turns but doesn't answer]
Simon : I'm a dead man; I can't know? Is it gold?... Drugs? Pirate treasure? What is that makes you so afraid of the Alliance?
Mal : You don't want to go down this road with me, boy.
Simon : Oh, you're not afraid of them? I already know you'd sell me out to them for a pat on the head. Hell, you should probably be working for them. You certainly fit the profil...
[cut off as Mal punches him, knocks him into the wall and floor; Mal stands over him]
Jayne : [sounds cocky] Saw that comin'.
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Mal : [on the 'lawman'] Comes time, someone's gonna have to deal with him. That should be you. But I don't think you've got the guts... And I know you don't have the time.
Simon : What do you mean?
Mal : [pause; face deadpan, voice serious/grave] Kaylee's dead.
[Simon doesn't react at first, then he looks a little shocked and afraid; as Mal turns and walks to the Bridge, Simon runs to the infirmary; sees Kaylee, quite alive; she waves at him]
Simon : [out of breath] That man's psychotic.
[on bridge, Mal, Jayne, Zoë, and Wash are laughing hysterically]
Wash : You are psychotic!
Mal : No! You shoulda seen his face. Oh, I'm a bad man.
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Zoë : [speaking quietly] Now we have a boat full of citizens right on top of our... stolen cargo. That's a fun mix.
Mal : [just as quiet] Ain't no way in the 'verse they could find that compartment, even if
[stops as someone walks by; continues quieter]
Mal : even if they were looking for it.
Zoë : Why not?
Mal : [short pause] 'Cause.
Zoë : Oh, yeah. This is gonna go great.
Mal : If anyone gets nosy, you know, just... shoot 'em.
Zoë : Shoot 'em?
Mal : Politely.
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Mal : [to his men, after an explosion knocks half of them down] Just focus! The Alliance said they were gonna waltz through Serenity Valley. And we choked 'em with those words. We've done the impossible, and that makes us mighty. Just a little while longer. Our angels are gonna be soaring overhead, raining fire on those arrogant Khags. So you hold.
[shouts]
Mal : You hold! Go!
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Lawrence Dobson : [holding him at gunpoint] Drop that firearm, Captain Reynolds.
Mal : [tosses the gun and holds his arms up chuckles] This is not my best day ever.
Lawrence Dobson : Simon Tam, you are ordered by law to stand down.
[Simon raises his hands in defeat]
Mal : What? The doctor. Oh. Hey, is there- is there a reward?
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Mal : [tossing her a bar with the Alliance stamp] It's pure, Patience. Genuine "A" grade foodstuffs-protein, vitamins, immunization supplements. One of those will feed a family for a month. Longer if they don't like their kids too well.
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Mal : Don't know how bright you are, top three percent, but you ain't weak, and that's not nothin'.
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Wash : What if we just told Mal we need a couple of days 'stead of asking him?
Zoë : He's the Captain, Wash.
Wash : Right; and I'm just the Husband.
Zoë : Look, I'll ask him.
Wash : Don't forget to call him "sir". He likes that.
Mal : [walking in] Who likes what?
Zoë : It's nothing, sir.
[Wash smiles sarcastically and gives her a thumbs up]
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Simon : So, does it happen a lot? Government commandeering your ship, telling you where to go?
Mal : That's what governments are for - get in a man's way.
Lawrence Dobson : Well, it's good, if the supplies are needed.
Jayne : We're just happy to be doin' good works.
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Mal : Got me a boatload of terribly strange folk makin' my life a little more interesting than I generally like. Chief among them an Alliance mole - likes to shot at girls when he's nervous.
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Badger : What were you in the war? That big war you failed to win? You were a Sergeant, yeah? Sergeant Malcolm Reynolds... balls and bayonets brigade. Big, tough veteran. Now you got yourself a ship and you're a Captain. Only I think, you're still a Sergeant, see? Still a soldier. A man of honor in a den of thieves. Well this is my gorramn den, and I don't like the way you look down on me. I'm above you, better than! Businessman see? Roots in the community. You're just a scavenger.
Mal : Well, maybe I'm not a fancy gentleman like you, with your... very fine hat. But I do business. We're here for business.
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Radio Operator : They won't move without a lieutenant's authorization code, sir.
Mal : [Mal runs over to a fallen Lieutenant; rips a badge off his uniform; runs back handing the badge to the operator] Here. Here's you code. You're Lieutenant Baker. Congratulations on your promotion.
[pushing him towards the radio]
Mal : Now get me some air support!
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Zoë Washburne : [having narrowly escaped an Alliance Cruiser] Close one.
Mal : Yeah.
Zoë Washburne : Any one you walk away from, right?
[sounds excited]
Zoë Washburne : As long as we got the goods, I call this a win.
Mal : [flatly] Right.
[walking away]
Mal : We win.
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Badger : You're late.
Mal : You're lying.
Badger : [looks at Mal in disbelief] What did you just say to me?
Mal : You're well aware we landed two hours before we planned to with all the goods you sent us after intact, ready to roll. So your decision to get tetchy, say we're late... means you're lookin' to put us on the defensive right up front. Which means something's gone wrong. It didn't go wrong on our end. So why don't we start again with you tellin' us what's up.
Badger : You're later than I'd like.
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Mal : It's been a long time since Patience shot me and that was due to a perfectly legitimate conflict of interest. I got no grudge. She owns half that damn moon now.
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Jayne : I don't understand why we didn't leave that son of a bitch in a pool of his own blood.
Mal : We'd be dead. Can't get paid if your dead.
Jayne : Can't get paid if you crawl away like a bitty little bug neither. I got a share of this job. 10 percent of nothing is... let me do the math here... nothing, and a nothing...
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[River wakes up screaming; looks around frantically; scrambles out of the box; cringes in fear, hyperventilating as Simon breaks loose from Jayne's grasp; cautiously approaches her]
Simon : R-River...
[River gasps]
Simon : Hey, it's okay. It's okay. It's okay... It's okay. I'm here.
River : [calms as recognition dawns on her] Simon.
[silence; starts breathing erratically and sounding frightened again]
River : Simon they-they talk to me. They want me to - They want me to...
Simon : No, they're gone.
[holding her face, sounds almost as afraid]
Simon : They're gone. They're gone. They're gone - We're safe now... We're safe. We're safe. I'm here.
[hugs her; whispers]
Simon : Come here.
[River still sobbing, hugs him tightly, as if afraid to let go]
Mal : What the hell is this?
Simon : [looks up, still holding a shaking River] This is my sister.
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Mal : It's been a long time since Patience shot me and that was due to a perfectly legitimate conflict of interest. I got no grudge. She owns half that damn moon, now.
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Mal : We've done the impossible and that makes us mighty.
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Wash : Captain, I got a ship incoming.
Mal : How the hell did they find us? I thought you said we could get around 'em.
Wash : It's not Alliance.
Mal : You sure?
Wash : It's a smaller vessel.
Mal : Commercial?
Wash : Um... yeah. I read it as an older model Trans-U class freighter.
Mal : I didn't know Trans-U class ships still operated.
Wash : They don't.
Mal : Get me a visual.
Wash : They're still too far out to...
Mal : [interrupting] Get me something!
Wash : [looking at the scanners] Wait a minute. I'm picking up a lot of radiation emitting from the approaching ship... why, they're burning without reactor core containment. Well, that's kwong juh duh. That's suicide! That's...
[both Walsh and Mal look at each other with dread and then turn to the spaceship in the distance getting bigger and bigger as it approaches them]
Mal : Reavers.
Wash : Oh god... oh god... oh god...
