- Sarmoti: [to Nelson] We all know Foo-Lin is crazy, but who gives a crap? She's a panda, you're a panda. This is the biggest no-brainer in the world.
- Sarmoti: [to Nelson] You're new with women and you're swinging for the fences. Let me save you a lot of heartache: You're not a powerhitter. Just lay down a bunt, get on base and thank the merciful Lord they even let you suit up.