- Ray Barone: Walter's dad owned an amusement park and Scott's an engineer. Not a "whoo-whoo" engineer, one who actually designs stuff.
- Debra Barone: Look, honey, I said that I would hear their proposal and I did, but nothing in it changes the fact that it's go-carts.
- Ray Barone: I know, but come on, that's what's fun about it. Plus, it's a solid investment. Besides, they're thinking of naming a go-cart after you. They are. "The Debra." It's black.
- Debra Barone: That is every girl's dream.
- Debra Barone: You're a homemaker, like me.
- Marie Barone: [Playing along] Okay.
- Debra Barone: Don't you think that you're entitled to an equal say in your family's financial decisions?
- Marie Barone: Absolutely, dear.
- Debra Barone: This is a list I put together to make that point with Ray.
- Robert Barone: Look how she puts a line through her sevens. Isn't that nice?
- [Marie starts chuckling]
- Debra Barone: What?
- Marie Barone: Just looking through some of this housekeeping things you claim you do. I think maybe I'm entitled to some of this money.
- Ray Barone: Looks like someone's padding the bill.
- Debra Barone: Look, Ray, I can't help it if people break in here and clean.
- Ray Barone: Yeah, well, the "in here" you're talking about is the house we bought with my paycheck.
- Debra Barone: Are you saying you're more valuable than me because you bring home a paycheck?
- Ray Barone: I'm not saying that. I think society says that. All right? You should talk to them.
- Robert Barone: Actually, Raymond, the best way to determine the value of someone's life is with a wrongful death settlement.
- Debra Barone: Oh, good. Good, 'cause we're about to have one.
- Robert Barone: No, really, I dated a wrongful death claims adjuster. And it was her job to figure out what a jury would award a family if a loved one were killed an accident. In other words, what they were worth. It was fascinating to see what she had to consider. Too morbid for a second date, but fascinating.
- Ray Barone: What? Like what?
- Robert Barone: Like they consider what kind of person you were. Take Dad, for example. Let's say someone dropped a piano on him.
- Marie Barone: [Playing along as before] Okay.
- Robert Barone: A jury would be asked to consider what kind of life he led. Was he a happy person? Did he bring joy to others? Did he stop and smell the roses?
- Frank Barone: Yes, yes and yes.
- Marie Barone: You don't enjoy life! You spend three hours every afternoon locked in the bathroom.
- Frank Barone: Hiding from you, that's how I enjoy life!
- Debra Barone: So you gave Scott and Walter money after I asked you not to?
- Ray Barone: No, I gave it to 'em before you asked me not to.
- Debra Barone: How could you do that?
- Ray Barone: I'm sorry, I'll get the money back.
- Debra Barone: It's not about the money!
- Ray Barone: Then I really don't understand the hateful screaming.
- Debra Barone: You really have so little respect for me, that you would do that without asking me?
- Ray Barone: I respect you.
- Debra Barone: Obviously not! You wrote the check before you even talked to me about it!
- Ray Barone: Because I thought you would say yes!
- Debra Barone: Well, I'm saying no!
- Ray Barone: Okay, you changed your mind!
- Marie Barone: Tell one of your jokes, dear.
- Ray Barone: What? Which one?
- Ray Barone: Tell the one about the guy who goes into a bar, and there's a dish of peanuts that says nice things to him. And he asks the bartender "What's with these peanuts?" And the bartender says "They're complimentary." Tell that one, dear.
- Ray Barone: You... you just told it, Ma.
- Marie Barone: No, no. You tell it so funny.
- Ray Barone: You just told the ending, Ma.
- Marie Barone: Well, tell the beginning.
- Marie Barone: Do you know that for more than 30 years I've been giving money to buy books for children in South America? You think your father would have approved of that?
- Robert Barone: He didn't like buying *us* books.