- Dr. Susan Lewis: [about her blind date] Let's put it this way: I almost had to fake it.
- Dr. Deb Chen: An orgasm?
- Dr. Susan Lewis: A seizure.
- Dr. John Carter: What do I want? I want you to stop being so afraid. I want us to stop being so careful.
- Abby Lockhart: I'm not afraid! I'm just...
- Dr. John Carter: I wanna marry you!
- Abby Lockhart: What?
- Dr. John Carter: I wanna marry you.
- Abby Lockhart: Are you proposing?
- Dr. John Carter: Yeah.
- Abby Lockhart: You're crazy
- Dr. John Carter: Well then, I'll fit right in.
- Gregory Pratt: [after complaining to Carter about the unpredictability of women] Now, you know who's got it all figured out? Homosexuals. No, I'm serious, just listen to me. Look, there's two guys living together. Toilet seat's always up, channel's always on ESPN. You can drink beers in bed, leave your clothes on the floor. I'm telling you, gay cats got it good.
- Dr. John Carter: Why are you telling me this?
- Gregory Pratt: I have no idea.
- Dr. Susan Lewis: [to Pratt and Morales, about a man they had previously pronounced dead on the scene] His alcohol content was 322. His blood was practically antifreeze. Even the two of you should know you're not dead until you're warm and dead.