Daria (TV Series)

The Misery Chick (1997)

Wendy Hoopes: Jane Lane, Helen Barksdale Morgendorffer, Quinn Morgendorffer

Quotes 

• Jane : When they say "you're always unhappy Daria", what they mean is: "You think Daria, I can tell because you don't smile. Now this guy died and its making me think and that hurts my little head and makes me stop smiling. So tell me how you cope with thinking all the time Daria until I can get back to my normal vegetable state".

  Daria : Ok... so then why have you been why have you been avoiding me?

  Jane : Cause I've been trying not to think.

• [after meeting Tommy Sherman] 

  Jane : I don't think he likes you.

  Daria : That doesn't bother me. What bothers me is that jerk is going to be treated like a hero for the rest of this life.

  Jane : Well, maybe he won't live that long.

  Daria : Come on. You know wishes don't come true.

  [a crash is heard off screen] 

  Kevin Thompson : [Off screen]  Oh, my God! The goal post fell! Tommy Sherman's dead!

  [Sobbing] 

  Kevin Thompson : He's dead!

• Jane : I don't like it when I say people should die and then they do. I don't want that kind of responsibility. At least not until I've got a job in middle management.

• Quinn Morgendorffer : So I called up Sandi, and Stacy, and Tiffany, and the Fashion Club is going to take up a collection to get safe new goal posts. Like, to honor the dead guy's memory.

  Helen Barksdale Morgendorffer : Quinn, what a wonderful impulse. To make something positive come out of this devastating event.

  Quinn Morgendorffer : Daria gave me that idea. She's really good at this tragic stuff.

  Daria : Thanks, but it was one of the safe new goal posts that fell on him.

  Quinn Morgendorffer : Oh! Well, it's the thought that counts.

  Helen Barksdale Morgendorffer : And how do you feel, Daria?

  Daria : I feel great. How else could I feel? I'm the misery chick.