- [Rebecca is trapped in Evan Drake's closet]
- Rebecca Howe: [to Norm, about Evan Drake] If he finds me here in the morning, he will fire me, hate me and he is never ever going to want to be my boyfriend.
- Dr. Frasier Crane: [about the psychiatric profession] You just don't cure someone overnight. Most patients require dozens of costly sessions to make even minimal progress. God, I love this profession.
- Norm Peterson: [to Evan Drake] Anyway, this is my fantasy sir. It's a little outrageous, so just stay with me. Even though I was born poor and I'll never be a rich man, somehow it wouldn't make any difference if one time, sir, just one time, just one darn time, I could do something symbolic: carry a rich man across the lawn in his pajamas.
- Dr. Frasier Crane: [to Norm] If you told Mr. Drake a sufficiently outlandish story, odds are he'd buy it.
- Woody Boyd: No, that's impossible.
- Carla LeBec: No, Woody, it's a stroke of genius. Frasier, you're brilliant. That is one of the most brilliant ideas you've ever had, and you've had a lot of brilliant ideas.
- Dr. Frasier Crane: Thank you, Carla.
- Carla LeBec: See Woody, it works. Bonehead bought it.