Batman: The Animated Series (TV Series)

The Laughing Fish (1993)

George Dzundza: G. Carl Francis

Quotes 

• Batman : [Francis scratches himself]  Feeling all right?

  G. Carl Francis : Oh, sure. It's just that everything's been so crazy today. I haven't even had time to rinse off that gunk the Joker's girl squirted on me.

  Batman : [yelling]  Get this man to a hospital, now!

  G. Carl Francis : [shocked]  What?

• G. Carl Francis : [seeing the Joker]  Great Scott!

  The Joker : Actually, I'm Irish.

• The Joker : Don't speak to me again,'kay? Now, what's everyone in town talking about?

  G. Carl Francis : Your fish?

  The Joker : [slaps Francis with a fish]  I told you not to speak!

• The Joker : Good morning, Mr., uh...

  [looking at his name plate] 

  The Joker : Francis. Please allow me to introduce my associates. Ms. Quinn.

  Harley Quinn : Enchante.

  The Joker : And messers, uh... oh. Their names escape me for the moment. No matter. We gentlemen of business have arrangements to discuss.

  G. Carl Francis : Uh... arrangements?

  The Joker : For my fish, of course. This has all been worked out far in advance, Francis. You are merely the last tiny cog in my grand design.

• G. Carl Francis : Uh, Batman, why is this happening to me? I've never done anything to this Joker. I'm just a paper-pusher. I can't change the laws. I'm harmless.

  Batman : And in his sick mind, that's the joke, Mr. Francis.

• The Joker : As I was saying, since every fish in Gotham now bears my famous and, frankly, fabulous face, I should be getting a profit from every fish product sold. Let's say, uh... a nickel per fish sandwich. Fifty cents for sardines! Millions of dollars a day to finance my happily hedonistic lifestyle. So, which of your tedious copyright forms do I fill out first? You may speak now.

  G. Carl Francis : N-N-No one can copyright fish. They're a natural resource.

  The Joker : But they share my unique face! Colonel what's-his-name has chickens, and they don't even have mustaches.

  G. Carl Francis : I can't help it. It's the law.

  The Joker : Oh, trying to cheat the Joker, are you? Well, we'll see who has the last laugh. You have until midnight to change your mind, Francis, or you'll be the poorest fish of all.