- [introduction, Hitchcock is sitting on a park bench reading a newspaper]
- Himself - Host: Good evening. Here we are in orbit once again. Most of tonight's program will be taken up with a story called 'Poison'.
- [a hissing is heard and the camera cuts to Hitchcock's back pocket that happens to be...]
- Himself - Host: A rattlesnake. It's a new warning device I've instituted to sound an alarm when a pickpocket is at work. He comes in several sizes, including very small ones for ladies' purses.
- [Hitchcock pokes at the rattlesnake making it hiss again]
- Himself - Host: He's very alert. This is far superior to ordinary burglar alarms, for if the thief is foolhardy enough to put his hand in the pocket...
- [shrugs]
- Himself - Host: There are a few bugs in it. Once when a thief put a hand in my pocket, the snake became confused and struck in the wrong direction. The doctor had to put a tourniquet around my stomach. Unfortunately, that proved to be the wrong stomach. It was the snake who died. I see that it is now what my sponsor calls 'high time' and here is what he thinks it is high time for.
- [afterword]
- Himself - Host: For failing to call a doctor when his friend was bitten, Harry spent some little time in prison. Apparently, the snake couldn't keep his mouth shut, which reminds me - I believe it is time for another message. However, I shall be back.
- [commercial break]
- Himself - Host: If you are interested in obtaining one of my pickpocket alarms...
- [reaches into his pocket]
- Himself - Host: Good heavens. I've been robbed.
- [takes his hand out of the pocket in exasperation]
- Himself - Host: Good night.