Shrek the Third (2007)
Cameron Diaz: Princess Fiona
Photos
Quotes
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Snow White : Right! Ladies, assume the position!
[Sleeping Beauty falls asleep, Snow White lies down in her coffin pose, and Cinderella seats herself on the floor gazing dreamily into space]
Princess Fiona : What are you doing?
Sleeping Beauty : [Snaps awake] Waiting to be rescued.
[falls back asleep]
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Queen Lillian : Hi-yah!
[smashes wall with her head]
Princess Fiona : Mom.
Queen Lillian : What? You didn't think you inherited your fighting skills from your father?
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Princess Fiona : [after learning that Rapunzel is dating Prince Charming] Rapunzel! How could you?
Rapunzel : Jealous, much?
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Shrek : Good morning.
Princess Fiona : Good morning. Ooh, morning breath.
Shrek : Yeah. Isn't it wonderful?
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Princess Fiona : Hi honey. Sorry we're late. You okay?
Shrek : Much better, now that you're here.
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Princess Fiona : [feeling her stomach] Shrek!
Shrek : [calling out to her] Yeah?
Princess Fiona : Wait!
Shrek : What is it?
Princess Fiona : [taking a deep breath] I'm... I'm...
[but was cut off by the ship captain's fog horn]
Shrek : [laughs] I love you too, honey!
Princess Fiona : No! No, I said I'm-
[cut off by the fog horn again]
Shrek : [grabs the fog horn from the captain, and throws it overboard] You're what?
Princess Fiona : I said I'm pregnant!
[the fairytale creatures cheer]
Shrek : [can't believe his ears] Oh... what was that?
Princess Fiona : You're going to be a father!
Shrek : [nervous laugh] That's great.
Princess Fiona : Really? I'm glad you think so! I love you!
Shrek : [smiles back at Fiona] Yeah...
[nervous laugh]
Shrek : Me, too.
-
Princess Fiona : Okay, girls, from here on out, we're gonna take care of business ourselves.
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King Harold : [coughs] I'm dying...
Queen Lillian : Harold.
King Harold : Don't forget to pay the gardener, Lillian.
Queen Lillian : Of course, darling.
King Harold : Fiona...
Princess Fiona : Yes, Daddy?
King Harold : I know I made many mistakes with you.
Princess Fiona : It's okay.
King Harold : But your love for Shrek has taught me so much.
[to Shrek]
King Harold : My dear boy, I'm proud to call you my son.
Shrek : And I'm proud to call you my Frog... King dad-in-law.
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Cinderella : Oh, Fiona, won't you please open mine first? It's the one in front.
Princess Fiona : [reads the card] "Congratulations on your new mess maker..." oh, 'mess maker.'
[laughs]
Princess Fiona : "Hopefully this helps. Love, Cinderella."
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[at Fiona's baby shower, a group of birds gently place a flowered wreath on Fiona's head]
Cinderella : Stunning.
Snow White : Look at you.
Rapunzel : Wow.
Snow White : Look you darling.
Sleeping Beauty : Just precious. Look at her.
Rapunzel : So, have you had any cravings since you've been pregnant?
Princess Fiona : [with her mouth full of cake] No, not at all.
[sniffs]
Princess Fiona : Do you smell ham?
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Shrek : I don't know how much longer I can keep this up Fiona.
Princess Fiona : I'm sorry, Shrek, but can you please just try to grin and bear it? It's just until Dad gets better.
[Shrek lets out another frustrated sigh]
Princess Fiona : Shrek?
Shrek : Yeah.
Princess Fiona : You look handsome.
Shrek : Ah. Come here, you.
[she gives him a supportive smile. He relaxes and smiles back. Fiona puckers up her lips and he leans in for a kiss, but their bulky outfits prevent it. They let out a huge breath of air]
Shrek : Oh, my butt is itching up a storm and I can't reach it in this monkey suit.
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Princess Fiona : Just think... a couple more days and we'll be back home in our vermin-filled shack, strewn with fungus, filling with the rotting stench of mud and neglect.
Shrek : Oh, you had me at "vermin-filled".
Princess Fiona : And, uh.. maybe even the pitter-patter of little feet on the floor?
Shrek : [laughs] That's right. The swamp rats are spawning.
Princess Fiona : Uh, no... you know, what I was thinking of is a little bigger then a swamp rat.
Shrek : Donkey?
Princess Fiona : No, Shrek. Um... what if..
Shrek : Yeah?
Princess Fiona : They were little ogre feet.
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Snow White : So I guess the plan is we just wander aimlessly in this stinkhole until we rot.
Princess Fiona : No, we're gonna get inside and find out what Charming's up to.
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Princess Fiona : [turns to Snow White's present] Who's this one from?
Snow White : I got you the biggest one because I love you the most.
Princess Fiona : [reads the card] "Have one on me. Love, Snow White."
[she pulls the string, opening the box to reveal a dwarf]
Princess Fiona : "Um, what is it?
Snow White : [laughs] He's a live-in babysitter.
Nanny Dwarf : Where's the baby?
Princess Fiona : You're too kind, Snow, but I can't accept this.
Snow White : Think nothing of it. I've got six more at home.
Princess Fiona : What does he do?
Cinderella : The cleaning.
Snow White : The feeding.
Nanny Dwarf : The burping.
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Princess Fiona : What are Shrek and I supposed to do?
Rapunzel : Well, now you'll have plenty of time to work on your marriage.
Princess Fiona : Gee, thanks Rapunzel, and what's that suppose to mean?
Rapunzel : Oh, come on now, Fiona. You know what happens.
[Cinderella prods Sleeping Beauty]
Sleeping Beauty : [wakes up] Huh? You're tired all the time.
Snow White : You'll start letting yourself go.
Gingy : Stretch marks.
Rapunzel : Say goodbye to romance.
[Dragon nods in agreement]
Princess Fiona : Um sorry... but how many of you have kids?
Doris : She's right. A baby is only gonna strengthen the love that Shrek and Fiona have. How did Shrek react when you told him? Tell me!
Princess Fiona : Well, when he first found out, Shrek said...
[get interrupted when Dragon alerts them]
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Snow White : [pacing back and forth] Have we had just stayed put like I suggested, we could be sipping tea out of little heart-shaped cups...
Cinderella : [scrubbing the floor] Yeah... yeah, heart-shaped cups.
Snow White : And eating crumpets smothered with loganberries.
Cinderella : Yeah... loganberries.
Snow White : [stops pacing] Shut up, Cindy.
Cinderella : Yeah, shut up.
Cinderella's Reflection : No, *you* shut up.
Cinderella : Just stay out of this.
Snow White : Who cares who's "running the kingdom" anyway?
Princess Fiona : *I* care.
Queen Lillian : And you all should care, too.