Guy X (2005) Poster

(2005)

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5/10
Nice idea – shame about the delivery
Chris_Docker23 August 2005
An engaging storyline and suggestions that it is in the mould of Catch 22 or M*A*S*H suggest great things for Guy X. A man is dropped off by plane at a remote army post in Greenland. His identity has changed, there is no way of correcting the records, and no way of getting off the base. He stumbles on something that people would rather keep hidden, and is also attracted to the commanding officer's girlfriend – all of which, together with a very crazy bunch of colleagues, puts him in some quirky and irreverent danger.

Adapted from a well received novel (No One Thinks of Greenland), Guy X should be a resounding success but sadly falls rather short of the mark. Natascha McElhone performs admirably, but her performance is not enough to carry a lacklustre screenplay, fuzzy directing, a miscast leading man (Jason Biggs) and supporting characters with insufficient talent. For American Pie (Biggs' earlier success), such shallow efforts might have been adequate, but Metzstein is clearly trying to make an art-house movie (he said as much at the UK premiere) without the necessary skills. The film lacks pace and is very unengaging. Falling asleep in it seems more interesting than caring about whether characters' identities are being administrated out of existence. By the end of the film you might be holding on to see if there is going to be a final explanation, or you might be past caring whether there is one.

McElhone and her colleagues, in the Q&A at its Edinburgh premiere, waxed lyrical about the book, the themes of isolation, and what it does to people (she seemed more serious about the film than the director or co-stars who mostly just joked). She convinced me there was a good story there, but also that as a talented actress she had nevertheless misplaced her faith in the team to pull it off. There is no more depth apparent to the characters antics than characters from, errr . . . American Pie. If Biggs and Metzstein want to make the jump to serious cinema, they need to go back to school first. With such a finely nuanced story, the lead actor should be able to exhibit a depth of charisma or otherwise maintain interest in a way that goes far beyond the demands of an action flick or lowbrow comedy. A director must convince an audience with sufficient skill and sincerity to get them to work harder than they would for popcorn entertainment. For this viewer at least, such things were not achieved in Guy X.

On the positive side, McElhone is interesting, it was a great idea, and the choice of sets is unusual. If that is enough to get you to spend your money, go for it – otherwise you might want to stay at home until this crew become more mature and deliver the sort of film that many believe they are capable of. Good ideas alone do not a successful piece of cinema make.
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4/10
Someone forgot the story
simon7023 August 2005
Dear oh dear oh dear.

About a US Army base in Greenland, this film could have been a winner.

Instead, due to the lack of an engaging storyline, it is pretty dull.

When the film ends, your reaction is likely to be "is that it?".

Some good performances and pretty well filmed for a low budget film, but I'd say an average day at work is more interesting than this.

The film is nowhere near as meaningful, funny, poignant or satirical as it thinks it is, instead it merely takes nearly two hours to tell a story which could easily have been well told in 30 minutes

I saw the UK premiere at the Edinburgh Film Festival and I'd be very surprised if Guy X sets the UK box office alight when it is released in October.
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4/10
What the Eff?
VJReeJr7 October 2008
I kept expecting a pay-off in this film; it never happened. It never really made any sense. It reminded me of a really bad X-files episode. Even Alien3 was more engaging than this.

However, Natasha McElhorne is hot (as usual) and her femininity is the only thing worth watching in this film. Even Michael Ironside - such a magnetic actor - is underutilized in this film. Otherwise, everyone else seems like they were hung over the day after a frat party with a great deal of drinking.

Sadly, this is not a good movie even though it seems like it ... just ... might ... make it, but doesn't. Maybe it should be redone with different actors and a much different director.
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Comedy? Thriller?
Gordon-1116 June 2006
This film is about a military man being mistakenly posted to a Greenland base.

The problem with this film is that it tries to be comedy, thriller and mystery all at one time. The end result is that it does not succeed in any of the genres. It started off as light hearted, such as the mosquito combat right at the beginning. However, after that it became more and more serious. In the end, we are supposed to get emotional. However, I did not feel this way at all.

It was probably because of the strange accent used by some of the characters as well. I had trouble understanding what they say.

I think it could have been a good film, if it could stick to just one genre.
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3/10
The trailer promises a comedy... well, don't be fooled.
noam-reisner13 March 2006
Warning: Spoilers
One of the perks of renting films on DVD is that you get to see a lot of small films that have either had small big screen exposure or have been released straight to DVD. For some months now I kept seeing trailers on other rented DVDs advertising "Guy X", and the trailers looked promising. The trailer sold this quirky Indy film as a black comedy - a Beckett-like theatre of the absurd meets "Buffalo Soldiers". So, naturally, when it was finally released I snatched it off the shelf, eager to watch the charming Jason Biggs breaking off from his teen comedy comfort zone... and the first twenty minutes of the film looked promising. Assuming at this point that our hero, a corporal mistakenly shipped to a remote US Army outpost in Greenland instead of Hawaii, is actually the "Guy X" of the title, I ticked the boxes as each of the jokes shown in the trailer came rushing by one by one: jokes about eating puffin pies, about guarding an ammo dump against polar bears and penguins, and about a guy desperately trying to go AWOL in the wastes of Greenland... and then what? Suddenly the film becomes all serious and preachy. Suddenly it's a darker conspiracy theory thriller. Suddenly the guy you thought was "Guy X" is not "Guy X" - Guy X is some mutilated Vietnam vet being kept alive in a secret hospital underneath the base... Now all of a sudden our hero becomes all serious and noble and devotes the rest of the film to uncovering the truth... At least that's what I think was happening before I fell asleep. I feel cheated. The makers of this film have suckered in unsuspecting viewers to watch their incoherent, badly scripted conspiracy movie-with-a-message by promising a black comedy with Jason Biggs. So what do they do? They cram the few funny bits from this miserable bore into a trailer and hope for the best. I hope the losers who made this film will never be allowed to make another movie for as long as they live.
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1/10
How could it be worse???
greymumster16 October 2005
The advertising for this movie is totally misleading. There is nothing remotely comic about it, dark or otherwise! In fact it plumbs new depths in banal humourless mediocrity. This film is SO bad that I cant actually think of anything that would make it worse. The so-called plot is risible and the acting performances are tentative, spongy and lifeless. The cinematographer managed to make some stunning landscape look really dull. There was no texture, no visual diversity, no nothing to grasp last straw-wise. The make up on bedridden man must have taken a long time, but SO What? Some of the audience walked out in the middle but I stayed until the end before deciding that it was utter utter utter.....I really resented paying the admission cost. thats how bad it is. Don't go.
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2/10
Weird anti military film seems to belong in a different era
btm119 October 2008
Warning: Spoilers
This anti-war film was made in 2005 but the story is set in 1979. It may have made more sense if actually produced and issued in 1979. It seems trying to be another M*A*S*H or Catch 22, except that it has no humor. What it has is a lot of snafus that the base staff and administration are not interested in correcting. Add to this a mysteriously secret section of the base that is classified and off-limits. Despite being classified, there is no security protecting either the installation nor files about it.

Relatively little is explained and the story line, such as it is, is hard to follow.
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7/10
Misunderstood black comedy
fishnose123 July 2006
Warning: Spoilers
One of the criticisms I've read and initially felt myself that this film tried too hard to be too many things. Was there comedy? Yeah. Mystery? Yup. Drama? A bit of that too. And when I finished watching it last night I was left wandering 'What have I just watched?' Quite frankly it's one of the better military comedies in the vain of 'M*A*S*H' and 'Buffalo Soldiers'. The film begins brightly and funnily with a soldier being unceremoniously dropped off (quite literally) in Greenland. With a case of frustrating mistaken identity Jason Biggs' Rudy Spruance must find his feet as the bases PIO, delivering news via 'The Harpoon' in a place where nothing happens.

Much like 'M*A*S*H' the army of 'Guy X' is filled with lovable goons that while away they hours with beer "No brew, no clue." and pursuing women, and Spruance is no exception chasing after the lovely Irene Teal. All seems destined for a happy romp beneath the eyes of an ignorant Colonel.

Then comes Guy X, played with subtle futility and anguish by a brilliant Michael Ironside, an un-named amputee secluded deep in the base. And this is where the change in tone comes. As the eternal sun makes may for permanent midnight in Greenland the comedy fades also. The comfortably absurd becomes hellish and violent and the futility and sadness of the soldiers existence becomes ever more apparent "We guard things, that's what we do!".

A sublime comedy that reveals that even what appears to be happily absurd can hide the darkest secret and people trapped in their own personal darkness (all the soldiers are at the base due to their own failings), despite their outward abandon and merriment.
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5/10
It ain't no M.A.S.H!
lastliberal4 August 2008
This is an interesting military comedy about a G.I. (Jason Biggs) who is misassigned to Greenland instead of Hawaii. What is even worse, it that he is supposed to be a Public Information Officer, and the CO (Jeremy Northam) wants a newspaper.

Being that I have been on remote bases (Hofn Iceland) and have also produced a base newspaper as an extra duty, it was of interest to me. The cinematography was outstanding, although it was actually Iceland in the film, not Greenland.

Biggs (American Pie), Northam (Gosford Park, Happy Texas), and Natascha McElhone (Solaris, Ronin) all gave good performance that kept you interested, but not completely satisfied. Biggs certainly enhanced his credibility as an actor in this film.

Guy X? well, that is something for you to discover.
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7/10
Interesting, beautifully photographed film stumbles in tonality
duane-woods8 November 2007
Warning: Spoilers
I just caught this film by chance on MovieCentral. I had never heard of it, so I had no expectations going into it and the only info I had on it was the obscure log line in MC's description of it. What I found was odd, and I raised an eyebrow at MC's description of it as a "black comedy". Reason being is that, like other posts have stated on here, X was neither very dark or very comedic, and therein lies it's tonal danger. The first thing that grabbed me was the cinematography. It starts out as absurd comedy-drama (I loved the mistaken identity snafu that never gets fixed), but then it flirts with drama and then melds into an odd mystery-thriller that seems like a sub-par X-Files episode. It was still enough to keep me interested, and not campy enough to drive me off.

I liked Biggs in the lead role, and I was wondering if I could distance him from American Pie; I did, and the other actors put in some good work as well. There are some great lines in it too, my favorite being "We're the US Army you piece of sh!t, that's what we do. We guard stuff". I wish the filmmakers had continued with the idea of purposeless army instead of straying down conspiracy alley.

If Guy X had stuck with the kind of MASH-in-Greenland kind of story, I think it would have worked better. For, when Biggs' character stumbles on the unsecured ammo depot filled with Vietnam amputees with weird prosthetics, the movie stumbles at that exact moment. Although the Biggs/Ironside conversations are handled slyly, it goes from being a wry, art-house take on arctic army life to an obtusely unresolved, wedged-in science experiment. I also think that the ending was too wrapped up, for it needed more chaotic absurdity instead of the full-fledged RESOLUTION (as I picture it written in red ink on the screenplay), tidying up the loose ends.

So, take it for what it is. The cinematography is beautiful, the acting is decent, the absurdity is great when it isn't switching genres, but the tone and balance in the direction and the screenplay needed to be refined. No, it's not MASH or Stripes or Catch 22 or even Jarhead, but it's a quaint, interesting - if not flawed - film in the same vein. I expect the filmmakers to improve in their next project with a leaner and meaner film.
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4/10
Apparently Guy X doesn't mark the spot. (very very very mild spoilers)
Lucky_C12 July 2006
Warning: Spoilers
Open at an army base in the middle of nowhere. Jason Biggs steps off a plane, to discover he's a victim of mistaken identity, shipped to the wrong army barracks. An interesting premise? Yes. A cue for comic misadventure as he attempts to escape? You'd think so. And whilst Guy X has funny moments, unfortunately they are few and far between whilst this film tries to decide what it wants to be. Plot lines are built up and then discarded in favour of other non-sensical ideas. The promising initial premise got lost between the mess of subplots fighting for attention. By the conclusion, with nothing answered and no satisfying ending, you'll wish it had just picked one and stuck with it. Too late.
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10/10
Offbeat, yet powerful.
jonny41126 August 2005
With all due respect for the previous reviewer, it makes no sense to review a film based on that reviewer's perception about what the cast and crew's attitude was like at a screening! I was at the same screening (I think the premiere was the previous night), and you can hardly blame the cast and crew for giving mostly funny answers to the questions - they were asked about whether they had eaten puffin, what it's like to film in Iceland etc, rather than about the film's content (except at the end, when some freaky stalker-type in the front row asked whether the film had any 'hidden messages'!?!).

"Guy X" is a serious film, with a light touch that means that it's unpredictable and non- generic. Some might find the way it moves tonally quite disorientating, but I think that that is what keeps it fresh. On top of that, it's beautifully crafted - only a blind person couldn't find the images arresting.

And, Jason Biggs really puts in a fine performance. Actually, I think he performs really well in "American Pie" too - he's required to do different types of acting in the two films and manages it with flying colours. I read on the internet that he won the Best Actor performance at the festival that the film had its world premiere.

If you want to see something generic, bland and predictable, avoid this film!
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7/10
X doesn't quite mark the spot
pantera19 February 2007
Greenland was apparently so named so it would inspire people to come there, in the same way that half of South Africa's fortress complexes have soothing names like whispering pines, while they're overlooking a motorway truck stop. Or Shay glades in the middle of the Karoo. And after seeing this film I know that it's not a place I'm going on holiday.

This the story of a Yossarian-like character,played by Jason "AMERICAN PIE(4/10) " Biggs, dropped of in this desolate hell while thinking he's on his way to Hawaii; part of a snafu in the military transfer machine. It's a base which exists for apparently no other reason than as a re-fueling stop on the way to and from Europe; though judging by the infrequency of the planes not a very strategic one. To add to all this he's misidentified as another person completely who at the moment is sunning himself in Hawaii. The more he complains about this situation, the more he is rebuffed. And then he discovers the base's secret.

Based on the book,NO ONE THINKS OF GREENLAND, it has elements of both Catch-22 and M*A*S*H (9/10) in it, without quite capturing the original spirit of both. Interesting point is that the film is based in 1979, just after the Vietnam war, instead of the original book which was based the same time period after the Korean War. To make it more relevant, I guess.

Jeremy Northam plays a wonderful ego-centric base commander, with the uniquely attractive Natasha McElhone as his secretary Northam is an actor who's been around a while and is just itching to break into the higher acting echelons as occupied by the Fiennes. Give him a little time.

It's a moody little film with some fun characterizations of the mostly semi-psychotic kind. Biggs shows that he can act outside the Pie trilogy, but I can't quite see why he was cast here. It is a British production and, like NOTTING HILL (8/10) with la Roberts or 4 WEDDINGS (8/10) with Angie McD, they've though it necessary to bring in an American actor for distribution in the states. But who the hell wants to see Jason Biggs in something other than teen slapstick. Let me re-phrase that; who wants to see Jason Biggs at all? And when he starts to charm the delicious Natasha, I suppose it gives hope to all the pimplicious in the audience that there is hope, Luke. Mind you with all the other creatures that infested the base, he was the normalest. Maybe, like the frog-eyed Steve Buscemi, he will win me over, but somehow I doubt it.
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1/10
Derivative drivel
slender_swimmer17 March 2006
There's nothing original in this dreadfully slow and bizarre Frankenstein of a film.

Several leading roles are played by non-Americans. The actors' attempts to mimic the Yank dialect (hey, let's go Southern--always easy!) are ludicrous to indecipherable. Guess the financing required a United Nations cast.

Plot holes abound. Dialogue often seems improvised, and not for the better.

This in an Altman-wannabe that's simply remaking M*A*S*H and doing a superbly bad job of it. Give it a miss. Pass it by. Run like breaking wind.

Skip it.
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Guy Zzzzzzzzzzzz
lou_jackson7327 September 2005
The establishing shots introduce a seemingly endless and dreary vista, a concept that the film then exploits with poor acting and a mundane story line.

Set on a US Army base in Greenland Saul Metzstein shoehorns in some unsophisticated communist imagery, made more obvious from wooden badly cast characters. The moralising of the story is minimised by the inability to sympathise or engage with the characters.

There is no chemistry between Biggs and McElhone. It seemed unbelievable to me that strong and intelligent Irene Teal would fall so naively for bullying Lane Woolwrap. Unfortunately Biggs will always be the guy who did 'that' to the Apple Pie.

The 'engaging hooks' the film presents are so tedious that once truths are exposed in the final act they create no greater emotional response than disinterest.
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4/10
weird, mysterious story on military base
ksf-27 March 2017
Warning: Spoilers
The sound quality in this thing is just TERRIBLE. did they rent the microphones from radio shack for one week for 19.95 ?? Soldier Rudy Spruance (Jason Biggs) gets dropped off at a U.S. military base on Greenland by mistake... he keeps telling everyone he's supposed to be at Hawaii, but they don't believe him. Would have made a great short film, but they take a 40 minute premise and try to turn it into a 101 minute film. Someone, somewhere, has made a huge mistake, but no-one seems to notice, and he doesn't try too hard to correct it, or maybe he's just given up. The script is a bunch of random lines, and no-one seems to connect on any level. Spruance occasionally talks with Sgt. Teal (Natascha McElhone, who looks and sounds like Jane Seymour), who seems to believe his story, but doesn't care. This probably would have made a great TV series, but doesn't really go anywhere as a film. Kind of an "X Files" kind of story. Some big mystery going on, with mysterious patients in some lab, but it's so boring that we just don't care. Yawn. The acting by Biggs is pretty good, but the story is so lame, that it just doesn't work. Directed by Saul Metzstein... looks like his specialty is directing television shows.
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4/10
comedy not funny, drama not compelling
SnoopyStyle15 February 2016
It's June 1979. Corporal Rudy Spruance (Jason Biggs) expects to go to Hawaii but is shocked to be abandoned on an isolated base in Greenland. He has been mistaken for a Cpl Peterson. Sgt. Irene Teal (Natascha McElhone) is happy to have the Public Information Officer Peterson for her base commander Col. Woolwrap (Jeremy Northam) despite knowing that he's not Peterson. Haphazardly, he tries to escape. The camp is populated by tired rejects resigned to their fates and he also resigns to be a writer for the base newspaper. Then he discovers a secret experimental hospital ward and he befriends X (Michael Ironside).

The pace is so slow that most of the quirky comedy doesn't work. The tireness coming out of the characters seem to infect the movie. It's trying to be funny but fails. Then it adds a drama which seems to come out of nowhere. None of the movie really works and it falls mostly flat.
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1/10
Expected Better! 1/10
leonblackwood4 August 2013
Review: I rented this movie because it looked funny in the adverts, but I never found it that amusing. In fact I thought that the movie seemed a bit dated and the storyline was silly. There was quite a serious under current in the movie but that wasn't enough to make the film interesting. The acting wasn't that bad but the concept was pretty dull. Disappointing.

Round-Up: I know that the film is old, but I recently saw it in an advert so I thought that I would give it a chance, which was a bad mistake. At the time of its release, it might have been funny but with all the Rom-Com's coming out lately, this is below par. Jason Biggs career hasn't really kicked off since the American Pie series and Natascha McElone seems to act the same in all her movies even though she has acted next to people like Robert DeNiro in Ronin, George Clooney in Solaris and Brad Pitt in The Devils Own.

I recommend this movie to people who are into there war comedies with a touch of conspiracy. 1/10
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3/10
What is This Movie About?
AngelHonesty12 October 2023
I was excited to watch Guy X because I saw that it was rated as a comedy and Jason Biggs was in the movie. I love him as an actor. But wow, it didn't take long for my mind to be blown on the fact that there is no comedy in the movie. It's extremely slow with no plot. It makes no sense. It's like a bad X-files movie. The only reason I kept watching was to see the hot Natascha Mcelhone who was stunning as always. Michael Ironside was greatly underused in the film for being such a great actor. The plot of the movie was beyound simple "what is this base? Why is it here?" Sounds like a fun question to answer. It would have been but it literally consisted of a guy walking around and exploring every building with random encounters with people.
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3/10
Ambrose Bierce would find GUY-X eccentric . . .
charlytully24 March 2009
Warning: Spoilers
. . . which is not exactly a compliment, as Ambrose wrote that eccentricity is "a method of distinction so cheap that fools employ it to accentuate their incapacity." Sure, I can see where GUY-X intends to follow in the footsteps of CATCH-22, M.A.S.H., and DR. STRANGELOVE. Maybe the novel this movie is based on is readable, but this flick is barely watchable. Even the mediocre movie versions of THE SINGING DETECTIVE, NAKED LUNCH, and EVEN COWGIRLS GET THE BLUES are all twice as interesting as this flick. Too bad there's no English version or U.S. DVD of PRUFSTAND VII, the 2002 German rendering of Thomas Pynchon's masterwork GRAVITY'S RAINBOW. I don't see how it could be a worse mash-up than GUY-X. A couple tips to director Saul Metzstein: 1)don't have TWO SCENES of nude chicks streaking on an army base if you can't afford at least 40 watts of lighting, and 2)if your plot involves a secret ward for horribly disfigured war casualties, provide some "back story" before the film is finished!

TO WHOM IT MAY CONCERN: The body of noted American author (An Occurrence at Owl Creek Bridge) Ambrose Bierce, born June 24, 1842, recently was discovered in total cryogenic hibernation at the back of a Central American warehouse. Bierce is expected to be fully defrosted by late 2049 or early 2050. Based on my 85 previously posted IMDb comments and background in Bierce studies, the author's guardians have commissioned me to review a periodically updated list of films to help guide his future leisure pursuits, with the provision that my comments also be made available to the general public.
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10/10
Not the film you were expecting - and MUCH better for it.
dany-4014 December 2005
I was taken to see this film by a friend, so knew nothing about it before seeing it (except that it starred the guy from "American Pie"). I thought the film was strange and unusual, but very thought-provoking, with shades of the Vietnam War, the "War on Terror", the mysterious CIA 'rendition' flights etc. I was surprised by the way, the comic tone shifted into something heavier and more serious.

Then, I went home and looked the film up on the internet... Boy! If ever a film was mis-sold! The poster says "Biggs is a comic genius". Well, he might be, but in this film he's the straight guy for sure. If I'd gone to see this, thinking it was "American Pie 4" (or does that already exist?), I would have been REALLY disappointed.

Really recommended.
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5/10
A musical comedy.
Bernie444430 November 2023
"Sitting on top of the world" "25 Miles" "When the Saints Go Marching In" "War" "Spinning Wheel" "Peer Gynt" "A Fifth of Beethoven" "Action Time Vision" "Louie Louie" "One Mint Julep" "Walk Like a Man" "Lonesome Day"

Interspersed with a Catch 22 environment and a dark secret.

Set in 1979 Corporal Rudy Spruance (Jason Biggs) is inadvertently deposited in a weird out post in Greenland, actually filmed in Snæfellsnes, Iceland. There he learns about edible Puffins and wayward blonds (Natascha McElhone.) Until one day he discovers the true purpose of the base. You will need to watch the movie to find out the secret, what this secret means for Corporal Rudy Spruance and us.
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3/10
Penelope did it better
Kamurai253 June 2020
Empty watch, not watching again, and can't recommend unless your a military movie nut.

Most of the movie felt like Jason Biggs hating his life and trying to get out and get laid (so basically American Pie without the humor or pastries, go watch that instead, it's much deeper). No one else is important, maybe Natasha McElhone (a fine actress), and everyone could really be played by anyone, that's how little they mattered.

While there is some great material to work with here, they don't utilize anything, including humor.

I would have thought I'd love to see a movie about a guy forced to live another soldier's life.

I would have thought I'd love to see a movie about a facility that has dead soldiers on life support because any number of potentially good reasons.

I would have thought a romantic triangle in a chain of command would be compelling. Plenty of room to push boundaries and play with the concepts of power.

The one thing it really does that pisses me off is that it tries to wax philosophical with the news paper (like a blog on paper), the whole reason the guy Biggs is supposed to be is there, and wants to be "Catch-22", but just fails in the dialogue and use of the paper itself and the Colonel's reaction.

Don't waste your time, there are so many better movies with...well, almost anything I mentioned in this review.
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5/10
One lime
strike-199514 March 2019
Good premise and location, but unfortunately the story doesn't live up to the log-line.
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8/10
Actors shine in Guy X despite, at times, confusing direction
kyle_jk25 September 2005
I recently viewed Guy X at the Montreal Film Festival and I was quite impressed. The movie was well done in it's presentation and unique depiction of a troubled war. The only downside was the director's vision of what the film was to be, switching between an army slapstick, like the movie Stripes, and a military mystery, like the movie Basic. I found it left the viewer at times wondering if we are to laugh or to just sit there in silence. On the bright side, the acting was well done. Each actor gave something special to this picture. Jason Biggs showed he can take a step away from his American Pie typecast and really deliver a dramatic performance worth noticing. As well, Sean Tucker added an extremely hilarious comedic injection to this movie. In my opinion, he WAS the comedy in this movie and should be recognized for it. All in all, a well done effort and a movie that should receive the accolades it deserves.
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